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You Don’t Need A Man You Need A Dog

Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://pixabay.com/en/dog-labrador-light-brown-pet-1210559/

This is for all the women out there who are desperately looking for a man. Maybe you don’t need a man you need a dog!

If you want someone who will make a total fool of himself because he’s so glad to see you, don’t get a man, get a dog.

If you want someone who’s always ready to go out any time you ask, get a dog.

If you want someone who’ll be content JUST to snuggle up and keep you warm in bed, get a dog. (You can always kick him out of the bed and make him sleep in the laundry room if he snores. Try THAT with a man!)

If you want someone who eats whatever you put in front of him, and never says “Why can’t you make it like Mom did?” get a dog.

If you want someone who can scare away burglars without brandishing a lethal weapon, endangering you (and all the neighbors), get a dog.

If you want someone who will do anything to please YOU, get a dog.

If you want someone to bring in your newspaper without tearing through it first for the sports page, get a dog.

If you want someone who never criticizes ANYTHING you do, doesn’t care how bad you look, acts as though every word you say is worth hearing, and loves you unconditionally, get a dog.

If you want someone who NEVER touches the remote, couldn’t care less about Monday Night Football, and watches teary movies with you as long as you want, get a dog.

ON THE OTHER HAND…

If you want someone who totally ignores you when you walk into a room, get a cat.

If you want someone who acts as though you are there only to see that HE’s happy, get a cat.

If you want someone who’ll prowl around all night and come home only to eat and sleep all day, get a cat.

If you want someone who leaves hair all over the place, get a cat.

If you want someone who never comes when you call him, get a cat.

If you want someone who’ll walk all over you, get a cat.


Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://pixabay.com/en/dog-labrador-light-brown-pet-1210559/

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