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Two Irishmen Shopping

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Two Irishmen were walking along a street in London, browsing in all the shop windows that they passed.

Paddy looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye. The sign read, “Suits @ £5.00 each, Shirts @ £2.00 each, trousers @ £2.50 per pair”.

Paddy turned to his pal and said, “Michael will you look at those prices! We could buy a whole lot of those and when we get back to Ireland we could sell them and make a fortune”.

So Paddy thought for a minute to see how to engineer his plan, then gave Michael his instructions.

“Now when we go in the shop, you stay quiet okay?” he said to Michael. “Let me do all the talking cause if they hear our accents, they might think we’re thickos from Ireland and try to screw us. I’ll put on my best English accent”.

“Right you are Paddy, I’ll keep me mouth shut, so I will” says Michael, “You do all the business”.

So, they went into the shop and Paddy said to the assistant in a posh voice, “Hello my good man. I’ll take 50 suits at @ £5.00 each, 100 shirts at @ £2.00 each, and 50 pairs of trousers at @ £2.50 each. I’ll back up me truck ready to load ’em on, so I will”.

The shop assistant said quietly, “You are from Ireland, aren’t you?”

“Well yes”, said Paddy with a surprised look, “What gave it away?”

The shop assistant replied, “Well, this is a dry-cleaners”.

Image used under a Collective Commons License from

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