It’s only March, and already we have a contender for the worst joke of the year. Enjoy it, or not… Either way, please share it with your friends – make them laugh or make them groan.
So a rabbit walked into a pub and said to the barman, “Can I have a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie”.
The barman was amazed, but served the rabbit a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie anyway.
The rabbit drank the beer, ate the ham and cheese toastie and then left.
The following night the rabbit returned and again asked for a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie.
The barman, now intrigued by the rabbit and the extra drinkers in the pub, (because word gets round when there are unusual clientele), gave the rabbit the pint and the ham and cheese toastie.
As before, the rabbit consumed them and then left the bar.
The next night, the pub was packed. There was barely room to move in there, so many people had come to see the rabbit.
Bang on time, in walked the rabbit and as before he said, “a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie, please barman”.
The crowd was hushed as the barman gave the rabbit his pint and toastie and then burst into applause as the rabbit wolfed them down.
The next night there was standing room only again in the pub.
Buses had even been arranged for the crowds of patrons attending the event.
The barman was now making more money in one week than he did the whole of the last year.
In walked the rabbit and said, “a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie, please barman”.
The barman said, “I’m sorry rabbit, old mate, old mucker, but we are right out of ham and cheese toasties”.
The rabbit looked horrified.
The crowd had quietened to almost a whisper, when the barman cleared his throat nervously and said, “we do have a very nice cheese and onion toastie though”.
The rabbit looked the barman in the eye and said, “are you sure I will like it?”
The massed crowd in the bar listened with bated breath and the bar was ear shatteringly silent.
The barman, with a roguish smile said, “do you think that I would let down one of my best friends. I know you’ll just love it”.
“Ok”, the rabbit said, “I’ll have a pint of beer and a cheese and onion toastie then”.
The pub erupted with glee as the rabbit quaffed the beer and munched down on the toastie.
He then waved to the crowd and left the bar….
NEVER TO RETURN!!!!!!
One year later, in the now impoverished public house, the barman, (who has only served 4 drinks tonight, 3 of which were his), called time.
When he was cleaning down the now empty bar, he saw a small white form, floating above the bar.
The barman said to the ghostly being, “Who are you?”
To which the phantom replied “I am the ghost of the rabbit that used to frequent your public house”.
The barman said, “Yes, I remember you. You made me famous”.
The barman continued. “You would come in every night and have a pint of beer and a ham and cheese toastie. Crowds of people came to see you and this place became famous”.
The rabbit said, “Yes I know”.
The barman said, “I remember, on your last night we didn’t have any ham and cheese toasties. You had a cheese and onion one instead”.
The rabbit said, “Yes, you promised me that I would love it”.
The barman said, “You never came back, what happened?”
“I DIED”, the rabbit said.
“NO!” said the barman. “What from?”
After a short pause, the rabbit said…
Gawd that’s a real groaner isn’t it.
Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.flickr.com/photos/11317612@N03/17013835719
If you don’t get the joke, here’s an explanation…
Myxomatosis is a viral disease that decimated the rabbit population in the UK and also Australia 70 years ago. If you are of a certain age or from the UK or Australia you have probably heard of it. If not, just click on the link to learn more.