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The US Air Force

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The US Air Force found they had too many officers and NCOs and decided to offer an early retirement bonus.

They promised any officer who volunteered for retirement a bonus of a thousand dollars for every inch measured in a straight line between any two points in his body. The officer got to choose what those two points would be.

The first US Air Force officer who accepted, asked that he be measured from the top of his head to the tip of his toes.

He was measured at six feet and walked out with a bonus of $72,000.

The second US Air Force officer who accepted was a little smarter and asked to be measured from the tip of his outstretched hands to his toes.

He walked out with $96,000.

The third US Air Force officer was a grizzly old Master Sergeant who, when asked where he would like to be measured replied, “from the tip of my manhood to my testicles”.

It was suggested by the pension man that he might want to reconsider his choise of body parts and he explained about the nice bonuses that the previous two officers had received.

But the old Master Sergeant insisted and they decided to go along with him, providing the measurement was taken by a medical officer.

The medical officer arrived and instructed the Sergeant to drop his trousers, which he did.

The medical officer placed the tape measure on the tip of the Sergeant’s manhood and began to work back.

“My God!” he suddenly exclaimed, “Where are your testicles?”

The old Sergeant proudly replied, “Vietnam”.

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