A Texas farmer was selling peaches that he had grown on his farm, door to door.
He knocked on one door and a shapely 40 something gorgeous woman opened it, dressed in a very sheer negligee.
He raised his basket up to show her the peaches and asked her, “Would you like to buy some peaches?”
The woman slowly pulled the top of the negligee to one side and asked the farmer, “Are they as firm as this?”
The farmer, starting to go red, nodded his head and said, “Yes ma’am” and a little tear ran from his eye.
Then she pulled the other side of her negligee off, asking him, “Are they as nice and pink like this?”
The farmer said, with a gulp, “Yes” and another tear came from the other eye.
Then the lady slowly unbuttoned the bottom of her negligee and asked the farmer, “Are they as fuzzy as this?”
The farmer again said, “Yes” and then broke down crying.
The lady asked him, “Why on earth are you crying?”
Drying his eyes the farmer replied, “Well ma’am, the drought got my corn, the flood got my soy beans, a tornado leveled my barn and now I’m figuring now I’m gonna get screwed out of my peaches”.
Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://www.rawpixel.com/image/2327997/free-photo-image-door-neighbor-front-door