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Thousands Of The Best Funny Jokes To Make You Laugh

The Hand Job

Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.maxpixel.net/Cuddling-Romantic-Romance-Hugging-Couple-Lovers-5483447

This is a joke about a hand job and yes it’s a little bit rude, so if that’s not for you, just skip it and move along. We thought it was pretty funny and most of our readers like a dirty joke, so hopefully we aren’t offending anyone and we have thousands of clean jokes too.

Anyway, back to the jokeā€¦

A young man has been wanting to ask the prettiest young woman in town for a date and finally he plucked up the courage to ask her out. To his delight, she agreed to go out on a date with him.

Now this young woman was gorgeous and she had been driving him crazy, setting his hormones racing every time he laid eyes on her.

So he took her to a nice restaurant, bought her a fancy dinner with expensive wine and on the way home he took a detour to a country road known locally as “Lovers Lane” and pulled over to the side of the road in a secluded spot.

As soon as he stopped the engine, they started necking and the young man was getting pretty excited.

Before long he started to reach under her skirt and she stopped him, saying that she was a virgin and wanted to stay that way.

“That’s ok” the young man said, “how about a blow job?”

“Eeww!” the girl screamed. “I’m not putting that thing in my mouth!”

Rather disappointed, the young man asked her if she would give him a hand job instead.

“I’ve never done that”, she said. “What do I have to do?”

“Well”, the young man replied, “remember when you were a kid and you used to shake up a Coke bottle and spray your brother with it?”

The girl nodded.

“Well, it’s just like that”.

So, the young man pulled it out and she grabbed hold of it and started shaking it.

A few minutes later, his head flopped back on the headrest, his eyes closed, snot started to run out of his nose, wax blew out of his ears and he screamed out in pain.

“What’s wrong?!” she cried out.

“TAKE YOUR THUMB OFF OF THE END!!!”


Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.maxpixel.net/Cuddling-Romantic-Romance-Hugging-Couple-Lovers-5483447

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