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The Greatest Country And Western Songs

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Have you ever stopped to think what might be the greatest Country and Western songs of all time?

Many Country and Western songs have common themes, like your car breaking down, your wife or girlfriend leaving you and other crisis topics.

Then there are all the Country and Western songs about fishing, dogs, beer, drinking, getting drunk, getting arrested, waking up in jail etc.

Here’s a good list to get started on. I suspect most of these aren’t real songs though. Maybe they should be. Any good (or bad) lyricists out there?

  • Get Your Biscuits In The Oven And Your Buns In The Bed
  • Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth ‘Cause I’m Kissing You Goodbye
  • Her Teeth Were Stained, But Her Heart Was Pure
  • I Changed Her Oil, She Changed My Life
  • I Don’t Know Whether To Kill Myself Or Go Bowling
  • I Flushed You From The Toilets Of My Heart.
  • I Keep Forgettin’ I Forgot About You
  • I Wanna Whip Your Cow
  • I Would Have Wrote You A Letter, But I Couldn’t Spell Yuck
  • I’d Rather Have A Bottle In Front Of Me Than A Frontal Lobotomy
  • I’ve Got The Hungries For Your Love And I’m Waiting In Your Welfare Line
  • If My Nose Were Full of Nickels, I’d Blow It All On You
  • If You Don’t Leave Me Alone, I’ll Go And Find Someone Else Who Will
  • Mama Get The Hammer (There’s A Fly On Papa’s Head)
  • My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field, While Your Dear John Was Breaking My Heart
  • My Wife Ran Off With My Best Friend, And I Sure Do Miss Him
  • Pardon Me, I’ve Got Someone To Kill
  • She Got The Gold Mine And I Got The Shaft
  • She Made Toothpicks Out Of The Timber Of My Heart
  • Thank God And Greyhound She’s Gone
  • They May Put Me In Prison, But They Can’t Stop My Face From Breakin’ Out
  • When You Leave Walk Out Backwards, So I’ll Think You’re Walking In
  • You Can’t Have Your Kate And Edith Too
  • You Done Tore Out My Heart And Stomped That Sucker Flat
  • You’re The Reason Our Kids Are So Ugly

Got any more we could add to the list? If so, please leave us a comment.

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