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The Blonde Calendar Journal

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Have you heard about the time that this Blonde woman decided to keep a calendar journal?

She jotted down on it all the eventful things that had happened each month throughout the year.

It read something like this…


Happy New Year to me. Took the scarf I bought back to the store – it was too tight.


Bummer of a month. I got fired from my job at a pharmacy for failure to print labels on medicine bottles. Well – DUH!!!! – the bottles wouldn’t fit in the printer.


Exciting month. Finished a jig saw puzzle in 6 months. The box said “2-4 years.”


Scary month. Was trapped on an escalator for hours. The power went out.


Frustrating month. Tried to make Kool Aid from scratch. 8 cups of water just will not fit into those little packets.


Adventurous month. Tried to water ski – gave up – couldn’t find a lake with a slope.


Defeated month. Lost breast stroke swimming competition – then found out the other swimmers cheated by using their arms.


Wet month. Got locked out of my car during a rain storm. Inside of car was ruined because top was down.


Dumb month. Lost a TV quiz show. The capital of California is “C”, isn’t it?


I hate M&M’s .. .they are so hard to peel.


Bad food month. Cooked turkey for 4 1/2 days. Was very dry – don’t know what went wrong – instructions said “1 hour per pound” and I weigh 108.


Accident month. Cut finger bad – couldn’t call 911 – DUH!!!! – there is no “II” on the phone.

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