Have we got a great collection of funny wife jokes for you here! We have been working on our jokes collection for a few years now, over 20 years in fact, and this website is the new home for our jokes collection.
One winter night, a heavy snow storm had covered a woman’s van with snow and it was stuck in their driveway, preventing her from driving it to work. Her husband got out the snow shovel and dug around the wheels to clear the snow. He then rocked the van back […]
The Best Funny Wife Jokes
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Have we got a great collection of funny wife jokes for you here! We have been working on our jokes collection for a few years now, over 20 years in fact, and this website is the new home for our jokes collection.
So, you enjoy wife jokes do you? Who exactly is the wife to you? Is it your other half, the “boss”, the old dragon, her indoors, or as my first wife used to like to be known, “She who must be obeyed!”
We hope you enjoy this selection of great wife jokes and please feel free to share them with your friends.
Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://pixabay.com/photos/wife-cooking-kitchen-preparation-5509209/
A man walked into a bar, pulled up a stool, called the bartender over and ordered a shot of whisky. He gulped it down and then peeked into his shirt pocket. A few minutes later he ordered another shot of whisky, gulped it down and again peeked into his short […]
Murphy was well known to be a grumpy old man. He complained about everything and everyone. Murphy was what you might call a “right miserable old sod”. When Murphy had to go to the hospital for minor surgery, he never stopped criticizing the room, the food, the noise, literally everything. […]
Murphy went to see the doctor and told him that he had been feeling ill. The doctor examined him, shook his head and replied “I’m sorry to tell you Murphy, but you have got the disease known as Yellow 24”. “What’s that?” asked Murphy. “It means”, the doctor said, “that […]
I was on the train the other day and asked a beautiful woman who was sitting next to me, “I love the perfume you are wearing, what is it called? I would like to buy some for my wife!” The woman replied, “I wouldn’t give it to your wife if […]
Murphy was headed up to bed when his wife told him that he’d left the light on in the garden shed, she could clearly see the light was on from their bedroom window. So Murphy opened the back door to go and turn off the light in the garden shed, […]
A retired gentleman went into the Social Security office to apply for Social Security benefits. After waiting in line a long time he eventually got to the counter. The woman behind the counter asked him for his drivers license to verify his age. He looked in his pockets and realized […]
A married couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party by some friends. Unfortunately, the wife got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. Her husband, being a really devoted husband, protested and wanted to stay at home with his wife, but she […]
Bob’s wife decided to go out and buy a new car. The salesman at the dealership eyed her up, pointed at a convertible sports car and said, “I recommend this one”. She asked him why and the salesman replied, “Because this car not only looks stylish and will have everyone’s […]
A redneck came home from work one day and found his young wife laying on the couch with a very swollen esophagus and neck and she had a really high fever. He immediately put young wife in his pickup truck and drove her to the emergency room of a local […]