A gorilla goes into a pub and sits down on a stool at the bar. The bartender, who was working a few feet away, was washing glasses when he saw the gorilla take his seat at the bar. He was astonished to see a gorilla in the pub and ran […]
Roger walks into a bar and says, “Bartender, give me two shots. One for me and one for my best buddy here.” The bartender says, “You want both drinks now or do you want me to wait until your buddy arrives to pour his?” Roger says, “Oh, I want them […]
Murphy and Paddy were sitting at a pub, drinking Guinness while watching the comings and goings at the brothel across the street. They watched as a Baptist minister walked into the brothel. Murphy turned to Patrick and said, “Aye, ’tis a shame to see a man of the cloth goin’ […]
One fine summer day, old Paddy was found dead in his back yard by a couple of his drinking buddies. As the weather was a bit on the warm side, the wake was held only two days after his death, so his mortal remains wouldn’t take a bad turn, if […]
Don’t you love it when you are caught unprepared and asked to buy tickets for the raffle. So, one evening, on his way home from work, Paddy popped into his local pub for a drink. The barman poured him a pint of Guinness and asked him if he wanted to […]
A European tourist had been travelling through Ireland, but he got lost and decided to stop in an Irish village to ask for directions. He saw two old men who were sitting outside the village pub, enjoying a pint of Guinness. “Parlez-vous Francais, the European tourist asked them. The old […]
A man was drinking at the bar in a local pub, and as you often do after a few beers, he found himself a new drinking partner. “I was married three times” explained the man to his new acquaintance, “and I will never marry again”. His new friend appeared interested, […]
It was a quiet day in an English pub, and a few local lads felt like starting a bit of trouble. Well just then Paddy, who was an Irishman who had moved to the area a couple of years ago, had the misfortune to walk in and order a pint […]
“Oh my God, bejesus! What on earth happened to you?” the bartender asked Kelly, as he hobbled into his local pub on a crutch, with one arm in a cast. “I got in a tiff with O’Riley,” Kelly sheepishly responded. “O’Riley? He’s just a wee fellow,” the barkeep said, surprised. […]
A man who is obviously as drunk as a skunk, walks into the front door of a bar. He staggers up to the bar, somehow manages to seat himself on a stool, and with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink of whisky. The bartender politely informs the man […]
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