A Catholic couple had been married for five years and were desperate to have children, but no matter how often they tried, how many different positions they tried and no matter how many books they read on fertility, the wife still failed to get pregnant. So, they went to their […]
The Best Funny Priest Jokes
57 posts
We have a great collection of funny Priest jokes here, as well as jokes about other members of the clergy including Bishops and The Pope.
The Laughline has a lot of religious jokes for you to enjoy in various categories. If you enjoy these, please share our posts with your friends.
See also Pastor Jokes and Minister Jokes.
Image used under a Collective Commons Licence from: https://pxhere.com/en/photo/412185
One Sunday, a Priest was giving a special children’s Mass to the congregation. During the homily, he asked the children if they knew what the Resurrection was. Now, asking questions during children’s Mass is crucial, but as you probably already know, asking children questions in front of a congregation can […]
Years ago in Ireland, there was a very anti British Catholic priest, who would let it be known in no uncertain terms exactly how he felt about the Brtish and he would tell his congregation every Sunday from the pulpit. After a while, the priest became so notorious, that the […]
Seamus went to Sunday Mass one day and the priest almost fainted when he saw him, because Seamus had never been seen in church in all of his adult life. After the Sunday Mass had ended, the priest approached Seamus and said, “Seamus, I am so pleased you decided to […]
Father O’Reilly had been preaching at his church in Ireland for so long, that he decided to take a vacation. He was curious as to what everyday life was like in the USA, so he decided that now was a good time to visit and see for himself, before he […]
Murphy was getting more than a little peeved with the frequent visits that his wife was getting from her two nephews, who were both Jesuit priests. She had got into the habit of wining and dining them royally and on one occasion she practically forced Murphy to kill the two […]
An old priest had come to visit a sick parishioner who lived in a lonely farmhouse in the west of Ireland. He arrived on a freezing cold, horribly wet day and was greeted by the farmer and his two sons. “Come in Father”, the farmer said. “My wife is through […]
Ah the demon drink, the root of all evil, or so the church would have you believe. A Catholic priest in Ireland was giving one of his parishioners his usual sermon about the demon drink and the problems it causes. “Abstinence”, the priest said, “is a wonderful thing, Patrick”. “Sure […]
Once upon a time a priest was given a new post at a church in Alaska. After a couple of years, the bishop went to visit him to see how his new posting was working out. “How are you doing up here?” the Bishop asked the priest. “It’s really cold”, […]
A priest was walking along the corridor of the pre-school wing of the school, dressed as usual in his clerical clothes, when a group of little ones trotted by on their way to the cafeteria. One little lad of about three or four, stopped and looked at the priest in […]
One morning a man walked into the Catholic church using a pair of crutches. He stopped in front of the holy water, splashed some of the water on each leg and then threw away his crutches. An altar boy witnessed the scene and then ran into the rectory to tell […]
So, our favourite Irishman Murphy went into the confessional box one Sunday and had the surprise of his life. One wall of the confessional box was a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On the other wall was a dazzling array of the finest Cuban cigars. Murphy was gobsmacked. […]