A refined lady dies and goes to heaven. She is chatting with St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, when all of a sudden she hears the most awful, blood curdling screams. “Don’t worry about that”, says St. Peter, “It’s only someone having the holes put into her shoulder blades for […]
Jokes tagged as: pearly gates
8 posts
A plumber turns up at the Pearly Gates one day and asks to be let in. “What job did you used to do then?”, asks Saint Peter. The plumber replies, “I was a heating and ventilation engineer.” St Peter replies, “Always the same, typical plumber, can’t tell the truth. Right […]
Three blondes died, and they all found themselves at the pearly gates of Heaven, standing before St.Peter. He told them that before they could enter the Kingdom of Heaven, they would have to demonstrate that they were Christians. To do this, he would require each of them to explain to […]
Einstein dies and as luck would have it, he has a chance of getting into heaven. He waits in line for a while at the pearly gates for someone to let him in, and then finally Saint Peter turns up. Saint Peter says to him, “You look like Einstein, but […]
One day, three nuns died and before long they were standing outside the pearly gates of heaven waiting to get in. Saint Peter approached them, and asked the first nun, “Do you know who the first man was on Earth?” The first nun said, “Ummm, that’s a difficult question, would […]
One day, while walking down the street, Susan, who was a highly successful woman executive, was tragically hit by a bus and killed. Her soul arrived up in Heaven, where she was met at the Pearly Gates by Saint Peter himself. “Greetings Susan, welcome to Heaven,” said Saint Peter. “Before […]
An engineer dies, goes up to heaven and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, I see that you are an engineer. I’m sorry, but you have come to the wrong place.” So, the engineer heads downstairs, lots of them, mile after mile, hundreds […]
Forty gypsies arrive at the Pearly Gates in their BMW’s, Trucks and caravans. St Peter goes into the gatehouse and phones up God, saying: “I’ve got 40 travellers here. Can I let them in?” God replies “We are over our quota on Gypsies. Go back out to the Pearly Gates […]
