At the Dublin Court House last Wednesday, Mrs O’Hennessy was charged with shoplifting a tin of peaches from a local supermarket. The Judge asked the prosecuting solicitor, “How many peaches were in the tin?” The prosecuting solicitor replied, “Four peaches Your Honour”. The Judge said to Mrs O’Hennessy, “You will […]
Jokes tagged as: Patrick Jokes
16 posts
Patrick was looking for a management position and went for a job interview with an executive for a position in his company. The executive wanted to learn something about Patrick’s personality, so he asked him, “If you could have a conversation with anyone, living or dead, who would it be?” […]
Murphy and Patrick went fishing one day down at the river where Murphy knew a good spot to fish. Murphy was an experienced fisherman, but Patrick wasn’t and after a while, Murphy noticed that Patrick was behaving really odd. Every time the Murphy caught a big fish, he put it […]
Murphy was hired to paint a green line down the middle of the streets in town to mark the St. Patrick’s Day parade route. On the first day, he got off to a good start and he painted the green line seven miles long. The next day, however, he painted […]
Murphy was a new employee at the office and he seemed to be working out ok, however after a few months he developed this habit of coming into work late every morning. Patrick, who was the office supervisor, couldn’t help but notice him coming through the office door late every […]
An Irish oil worker is on a job in the frozen north of Alaska. It’s forty below zero one winter night and Patrick is as usual drinking at his local saloon. The bartender says to him, “Patrick, you owe me quite a bit on your tab, it’s starting to build […]
Murphy and Paddy were sitting at a pub, drinking Guinness and watching the brothel across the street. They watched as a Baptist minister walked into the brothel. Murphy turned to Patrick and said, “Aye, ’tis a shame to see a man of the cloth goin’ bad.” A few minutes later, […]
Murphy and Patrick, two Irish labourers, wandering aimlessly across their work site, were asked by the foreman what they were doing. “We’re carrying these bricks to the other end of the site.” They told him. “What bricks?” He asked them “Will you look at that” says Murphy to Patrick. “We’ve […]
Patrick, an elderly businessman buys a very large house in Ireland, and the house is situated near the Cliffs Of Mohr in County Clare, overlooking the sea. One evening, Patrick is out for his usual walk before going to bed. The evening is a very blustery one. He ventures a […]
It is a little known history fact, but a pair of Irish twins sailed with the explorer Sir Walter Raleigh. The Quinn twins from Dublin were almost identical, except that Patrick had one huge eye and one normal one, while Michael had one huge ear and one normal one. They […]
