Did you hear the story about when Paddy broke his leg and his mate Michael went round to see him? He found Paddy sitting on the couch with his leg in a cast, up to the thigh. Michael asked him, “How are you doing Paddy?” Paddy replied, “Do us a […]
The Best Funny Michael Jokes
10 posts
Baggy shorts or Speedos? What’s your preference when going to the beach? Baggy shorts might be more comfortable, but those European men in their Speedos sure know how to pull the girls. An Irishman was vacationing in Miami, Florida and could not understand why his friend Jean Paul from France […]
God, having finally completed the creation of Earth, put down his tools, sighed a deep sigh of satisfaction and proudly pointed downwards through the clouds. “Look, Michael, look what I’ve made”, he called out to one of the angels. Archangel Michael looked puzzled and said, “What is it Lord?” “It’s […]
An old priest had come to visit a sick parishioner who lived in a lonely farmhouse in the west of Ireland. He arrived on a freezing cold, horribly wet day and was greeted by the farmer and his two sons. “Come in Father”, the farmer said. “My wife is through […]
Two Irishmen were walking along a street in London, browsing in all the shop windows that they passed. Paddy looked in one of the shop windows and saw a sign that caught his eye. The sign read, “Suits @ £5.00 each, Shirts @ £2.00 each, trousers @ £2.50 per pair”. […]
Michael from Dublin appeared on Irish television on “Who Wants To Be A Millionaire”. Towards the end of the program he had already won €500,000. “You have done very well so far”, said the show’s presenter, “but for a million Euros you have only got one life line left – […]
It is a little known history fact, but a pair of Irish twins sailed with the explorer Sir Walter Raleigh. The Quinn twins from Dublin were almost identical, except that Patrick had one huge eye and one normal one, while Michael had one huge ear and one normal one. They […]
Murphy and Paddy were walking through the woods on their way back from the pub. In a the middle of the woods, they came across a sign that said, “Tree Fellers Wanted”. Murphy said, “Ye know Paddy, it’s a shame Michael isn’t here. We could have gotten the job”. Image […]
After a night of heavy drinking, two Irishmen stagger home from their country pub, intending to take a short cut through the graveyard. Being much the worse for wear, they decide to take a rest against a stone, where Paddy reads the inscription. “Do y’know, Michael, this fella here lived […]
Two Irishmen emmigrate to Canada and land themselves a job at a sawmill. Just before the morning break, Patrick yells out “Michael, come ‘ere, I’ve lost me finger!” “Have you now,” said Michael. “And how did you do that then?” Patrick replied “Well I just touched this big, shiny spinning […]
