The Best Funny Italian Jokes
26 posts
So an Italian man was out drinking in various bars, hoping to get lucky picking up a girl to spend the night with. While at his favourite bar, he managed to hit on a rather gorgeous blonde woman. A few drinks later, by which time she was rather tipsy and […]
Two Italian men got on the bus and it pulled away from the bus stop. They sat down and proceeded to engage in an animated conversation, as Italians often do. An old lady who was sitting behind them on the bus ignored their conversation at first, but she couldn’t help […]
Do you know the difference between Heaven and Hell? This is something most Europeans will understand and hopefully find really amusing, but I guess it depends where you come from and whether you can see the funny side. Heaven is a place where the police are English, the chefs are […]
Three Italian nuns died and went to heaven. Sure enough, St. Peter was there to greet them at the Pearly Gates. He said to the Italian nuns, “Sisters, you all led such exemplary lives down on Earth, that the Lord is granting you six months to go back to Earth […]
There was an incident this morning when five Germans in an Audi Quattro arrived at the Italian border. The Italian customs officer stopped them and told them: “Itsa illegala to putta 5 people in a Quattro!” “Vot do you mean, it’s illegal?” the German driver asked. “Quattro means four!” replied […]
Unknown to his wife, a wealthy man had a secret affair with an Italian woman which carried on for several years. One night, while they were in bed together, the Italian woman told her lover that she was pregnant. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he agreed […]
Many people think they know how to recognize an Italian American, but the reality is that there are many more ways to identify them than just their looks, mannerisms and language. Many Italian Americans also claim to eat “Mommas Home Cooking” but many dishes are more American than Italian, take […]
An 80 year old Italian man from New York went to the doctor for a physical examination. The doctor was absolutely amazed at what good shape the man was in and asked him, “How do you stay in such great physical condition?” The man replied, “I’m Italian and I play […]
People from different places often have different driving styles, but have you ever looked at someone driving strangely and wondered where they might come from? Here are some simple guidelines for helping you determine where a driver comes from. We can’t guarantee the answer is correct in every case, but […]
Three spies get captured and are placed in a prison cell together. One spy is French, one spy is English and the other spy is Italian. Their captors come into the cell, grab the French spy, drag him into the next room and sit him down in a a chair. […]
It was time for lunch on the construction site and three workmen sat down on the roof of a building to eat their lunch. One man was Italian, the second was Mexican and the third was Polish. The Italian man opened his lunch box and said, “Spaghetti again! I have […]
The Mafia were looking for a new man to make weekly collections from all the private businesses that they were “protecting“. Feeling the heat from the police force, they decide to use a deaf person for the job, thinking that if he were to get caught, he wouldn’t be able […]