A man and his dog were walking along a deserted country road. The man was enjoying the tranquility and the scenery, when it suddenly occurred to him that he was dead. He remembered dying and also recalled that the dog walking beside him was his old dog that had been […]
The Best Funny hell
I do love the Irish way of thinking, don’t you? I mean, everything in life seems to have a moral or a purpose and whatever happens… well it happens. Take for example this classic bit of Irish philosophy… In life, there are only two things to worry about, either you […]
A young woman came home from a date looking really sad. When her mother asked her daughter what was wrong she said, “Charlie asked me to marry him a few minutes ago”. “That’s wonderful sweetheart”, her mother said, “But you have been out on a lovely date, Charlie proposed to […]
Do you know the difference between Heaven and Hell? This is something most Europeans will understand and hopefully find really amusing, but I guess it depends where you come from and whether you can see the funny side. Heaven is a place where the police are English, the chefs are […]
A teacher was telling her class about whales and said that even though a whale is a very large mammal, it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human, because the throat of a whale is very small. A young girl in the class put her hand up […]
With the Presidential election coming up very soon, here’s a good joke about a dead Senator that you will hopefully enjoy. A U.S. Senator was walking down the street one day when he was hit by a truck and died. The Senator’s soul arrived in Heaven and was met by […]
St. Brigid of Kildare, now one of Ireland’s patron saints, having had a life of piety, died and went to Heaven. God greeted her warmly at the Pearly Gates. “Be thou hungry, Brigid?” God asked her. “I could eat something”, she said. So, God opened a can of tuna, reached […]
A man died and to his great disappointment he was sent to Hell instead of being sent to Heaven as he expected. When he arrived in Hell, he was intrigued to find that there was a different Hell for each country and that you actually had a choice of which […]
One day, while walking down the street, Susan, who was a highly successful woman executive, was tragically hit by a bus and killed. Her soul arrived up in Heaven, where she was met at the Pearly Gates by Saint Peter himself. “Greetings Susan, welcome to Heaven,” said Saint Peter. “Before […]
An engineer dies, goes up to heaven and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, I see that you are an engineer. I’m sorry, but you have come to the wrong place.” So, the engineer heads downstairs, lots of them, mile after mile, hundreds […]
This is a hilarious stand up routine featuring Rowan Atkinson (best known for his roles as Mr. Bean and Blackadder) about welcoming newcomers to Hell.
Bill Gates died in a car accident. He found himself in Purgatory being sized up by God. … “Well, Bill, I’m really confused on this call. I’m not sure whether to send you to Heaven or Hell. After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every […]