You have come to the right place if you are looking for Heaven Jokes.
God went missing for six days from the Kingdom of Heaven, creating as you might imagine a bit of a panic, all the Angels, Apostles and the company of Heaven wondered where God had got to and search parties were sent out to find him. Eventually, Archangel Michael found him […]
The Best Funny Heaven Jokes
43 posts
You have come to the right place if you are looking for Heaven Jokes.
Heaven is featured in a lot of religious jokes, and as we have a really large collection of religious jokes, it’s only natural that there are a lot of jokes about heaven in the collection.
If you are looking for jokes about God, Jesus, Saint Peter, or various people who have died and are trying to get into heaven, you can also find plenty of them here.
Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://pixabay.com/illustrations/heaven-stairs-woman-silhouette-5773584/
Father O’Donnell woke up Sunday morning to find that the weather was absolutely perfect for a round of golf. He mulled this over in his head for some time, since it was Sunday and he was due to deliver the Mass. But the weather was just perfect for playing golf […]
Four Women arrived at the pearly gates of Heaven, where they found St. Peter waiting for them. When they went to go in, St. Peter said to them: “Those of you that have been unfaithful to your husband, raise one hand”. Three of the four women slowly raised their hands […]
With the Presidential election coming up very soon, here’s a good joke about a dead Senator that you will hopefully enjoy. A U.S. Senator was walking down the street one day when he was hit by a truck and died. The Senator’s soul arrives in Heaven and is met by […]
A young man died and as so often happens in stories like this, he went to Heaven, where he found he was the third in line at the Pearly Gates. St. Peter was taking a much needed break, so an angel was admitting the newly arrived to Heaven and the […]
A young boy was waiting outside the grocery store while his mother was doing the shopping. While he was waiting, he was approached by a man who asked him, “Son, can you tell me where the Post Office is?” The young boy replied, “Sure Mister! Just go straight down this […]
Two old men who were in their 80’s had been best friends and had played golf together for most of their lives. When it was clear that Charlie was dying, Daniel went to visit his best friend every day. One day, Daniel said, “Charlie, we both loved playing golf all […]
I bet you didn’t know that all arrivals in heaven have to go through a bureaucratic examination to determine whether admission will be granted to a new arrival or not. One room has a clerk, who inputs computerized records of what each applicant did on his or her last day […]
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let’s all get drunk and go to heaven! Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.pexels.com/photo/summer-sunshine-alcohol-drink-1862/
Have you ever stopped to think how women get to heaven? This short story (which is just a little bit rude) provides one answer to this age old question. A small boy walked into his mother’s bedroom and caught her standing topless in front of the mirror. “Mommy, Mommy, what […]
