Three fairly dumb looking men just died and are waiting outside the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question. St. Peter asks the first man, “WHAT IS EASTER?” The man replies, “Oh, that’s easy, it’s the […]
Jokes tagged as: heaven
16 posts
Three blondes died, and they all found themselves at the pearly gates of Heaven, standing before St.Peter. He told them that before they could enter the Kingdom of Heaven, they would have to demonstrate that they were Christians. To do this, he would require each of them to explain to […]
Einstein dies and as luck would have it, he has a chance of getting into heaven. He waits in line for a while at the pearly gates for someone to let him in, and then finally Saint Peter turns up. Saint Peter says to him, “You look like Einstein, but […]
Little Tommy came home from school one day, and found his pet chicken dead. It was just laying on the ground with it’s legs pointing straight up into the sky. When his father got home, he explained to Tommy that the chicken had died, he was going to heaven, and […]
One day, three nuns died and before long they were standing outside the pearly gates of heaven waiting to get in. Saint Peter approached them, and asked the first nun, “Do you know who the first man was on Earth?” The first nun said, “Ummm, that’s a difficult question, would […]
One day, while walking down the street, Susan, who was a highly successful woman executive, was tragically hit by a bus and killed. Her soul arrived up in Heaven, where she was met at the Pearly Gates by Saint Peter himself. “Greetings Susan, welcome to Heaven,” said Saint Peter. “Before […]
After dinner, Paddy raises his glass and toasts his girlfriend with the words “May you be in Heaven a half-hour before the devil knows you’re dead!” “What’s that mean?”. she asks him. “That is an authentic Irish toast” replies Paddy. “Oh. In that case”, she says, “Here’s to bread, eggs […]
An engineer dies, goes up to heaven and reports to the pearly gates. St. Peter checks his dossier and says, “Ah, I see that you are an engineer. I’m sorry, but you have come to the wrong place.” So, the engineer heads downstairs, lots of them, mile after mile, hundreds […]
A Zebra dies and arrives at the Pearly Gates. As he enters, he asks St. Peter, ‘I have a question that’s haunted me all of my days on earth. Am I white with black stripes, or am I black with white stripes?’ St. Peter said, ‘That’s a question only God […]
Forty gypsies arrive at the Pearly Gates in their BMW’s, Trucks and caravans. St Peter goes into the gatehouse and phones up God, saying: “I’ve got 40 travellers here. Can I let them in?” God replies “We are over our quota on Gypsies. Go back out to the Pearly Gates […]