“You looked troubled”, I said to my friend when we were talking the other day. “What’s the problem?” I asked him. He answered, “I’m going to be a father”. “But that’s wonderful news,” I said. “How come you look so troubled?” He replied, “There’s wonderful about it? My wife doesn’t […]
The Best Funny Father Jokes
24 posts
A young girl and her Mother were out shopping one day at the mall, when the young girl asked her Mother, “Mommy, how old are you?” Her Mother said “Honey, women don’t talk about their age. You will learn that later on in life”. A little while later, the young […]
Don’t you just love the way that children think. This teacher had a surprise when she asked a pupil a question about how old his parents were and didn’t get the answer that she expected. A teacher asked her pupil, “Thomas, if both of your parents were born in 1980, […]
The following are all “supposedly” genuine replies that British women have put on Child Benefit claim forms in the section where you list the father’s details. Don’t you love these extracts from the comments that people have left on forms? I know I do. Whether it’s motor insurance accident claims […]
A little boy went up to his father and asked him, “Dad, where did all of my intelligence come from?” His father thought for a minute, then replied: “Well, son, you must have gotten it from your mother, ’cause I still have mine”. I can just imagine someone being in […]
A young mother came into my father’s insurance office recently, wheeling her newborn twins in a double stroller. Like any typical man would, my father asked the young mother if she ever had any trouble telling the twins apart. She woman gave him a funny look and then replied haughtily, […]
Little Johnny and little Timmy were in the playground having an argument about their families and who had the best. “My father is better than your father”, said little Timmy. “No he’s not”, little Johnny replied. “Well, my brother is better than your brother”, little Timmy called back. “No he’s […]
A mother and father made a doctor’s appointment for their six year old son. With some hesitation, they explained to the doctor, that although their little Johnny appeared to be in good health, they were concerned that he had a rather small penis. After examining the young boy, the doctor […]
My 12-year-old daughter asked me, “Dad, do you have a baby picture of yourself? I need it for a school project”. I gave her one without thinking to ask what the project was. A few days later I was in her classroom for a parent teacher meeting, when I noticed […]
After church one Sunday morning, a family were walking home when the mother commented to her husband, “The choir was awful this morning”. The father commented back to her, “Yes it was, and the sermon was too long as well”. Their seven year old daughter added, “Well, you have to […]
