An extraordinarily handsome man who was also rather conceited, decided he had the “God given” responsibility to marry the perfect woman, so they could produce children that were beyond comparison. Having made this his mission in life, he began searching for the perfect woman. After a long but fruitless search […]
Jokes tagged as: Farmer Jokes
33 posts
One winter, Howard and Donald decided to build a skating rink in the middle of a pasture on their farm. A shepherd, who was leading his flock of sheep, decided to take a shortcut across the skating rink. The sheep, however, were afraid of the ice and didn’t want to […]
The farmer’s wife went to see the doctor to ask him about her husband’s chronic biliousness. The doctor advised her to give him liquid paraffin. The farmer’s wife went and purchased paraffin oil by mistake and gave some to her husband. The next day he was very ill, so she […]
An old priest had come to visit a sick parishioner who lived in a lonely farmhouse in the west of Ireland. He arrived on a freezing cold, horribly wet day and was greeted by the farmer and his two sons. “Come in Father”, the farmer said. “My wife is through […]
Pretty much everyone has heard of Yodelling and that it originated in Switzerland, but not many people know the history of Yodelling. I am guessing that you don’t know the history of Yodelling, otherwise why would you be here? Read on friend and you shall be enlightened. The history of […]
A mouse looked through the crack in the farmhouse wall to see the farmer and his wife opening a package. “What delicious food might this package contain?” the mouse thought to himself. He was devastated to discover that it was a mousetrap. Retreating to the farmyard, the mouse proclaimed a […]
Murphy who was an elderly farmer got married to a lovely young woman, but after a few months the marriage to his young wife was not working out too well. So, he decided to consult his doctor to see what advice the doctor could give him. After listening to Murphy’s […]
A female reporter from a local television station was interviewing a farmer, seeking the main cause of Mad Cow Disease. The camerman gave the “Ok” signal, and the reporter began her interview with, “Good evening, sir. I am here to try and get some insights as to the possible source […]
A city slicker decides that he has had enough of living in the city. He decides that he wants to become a farmer, so he moves to the country where he buys a farm. He heads to the local co-op and tells the man, “Give me a hundred baby chickens”. […]
A chicken farmer went to the local watering hole and pulled up a stool and ordered champagne. A woman was sitting on the stool next to him. She turned to him and said: “How strange, I also just ordered a glass of champagne.” “What a coincidence”, said the farmer. He […]
