For a special birthday treat, Liam had taken his fiancee Siobhan out for a fancy meal at a posh restaurant. The menu looked rather too expensive for Liam’s wallet, so while he perused the menu, he gradually whittled down Siobhan’s choice to either chicken and salad. Finally, they both decided […]
The Best Funny Fancy Jokes
13 posts
A blonde woman had always wanted to own a really fancy car and she had just bought herself a BMW. To have an expensive car, a status symbol to drive around and flaunt had been her dream for years and she had scrimped and saved, worked overtime and finally had […]
Three sisters, Monica, Phoebe and Fanny had one thing in common, they all had big feet. One day, all three of them went into a panic because they had been invited to a fancy party where there would be dancing, lots of dancing. As they loved dancing but didn’t have […]
One evening a man entered a fancy bar which had lots of fancy flashing lights outside. He walked up to the bar and ordered a fancy drink. He was amazed to see that the bar actually had a robot for a bartender. The robot served him a perfectly prepared cocktail […]
Paddy and Joseph were hitchhiking one day, but not having a lot of success in thumbing a lift. “I think it might be best if we split up”, said Paddy. “We are not having much luck hitchiking, we might find it easier to get a lift if there is only […]
Paddy and Bridget had just got married and were about to experience their wedding night in the bridal suite of a fancy hotel. Bridget was lying on her back on the bed, wearing an incredible shimmering silky negligee whimpering, “Take me Paddy. Take me now!” Paddy, being a good Catholic […]
Bob was taking Sue out on their first date together and he wanted to make sure all went really well. So, when he picked her up at her house, he was most gentlemanly and chivalrous, even opening and closing the car door for her. At dinner,Bob and Sue enjoyed each […]
Jack is struggling through a bus station with two huge and obviously heavy suitcases, when a stranger walks up to him and asks “Have you got the time?” Jack sighs, puts down the suitcases and glances at his wrist. “It’s a quarter to six,” he says. “Hey, that’s a pretty […]
Two confirmed bachelors sat talking, and their conversation drifted from politics to cooking. “I got a cookbook once,” said one bachelor, “but I could never do anything with it.” “Too many fancy recipes in it, eh?” asked the other bachelor. “You said it”, the first bachelor replied. “Every one of […]
Two horses were sitting in a bar, having a drink or two. One horse said to the other, “I am such a wonderful horse. I made $100,000 for my owner racing last year.” The second horse replied, “That’s nothing! I made $1 million for my owner last year.” At that […]
A man goes into a really fancy restaurant wearing a shirt that is open at the collar. He is told by the concierge that open neck shirts are not allowed, and that he must wear a tie around his neck to gain admission. So, really wanting to dine there, as […]
Can you imagine never having seen a mirror before? I can see you thinking already that this must be a terrible joke and to be sure you aren’t wrong there. But bad jokes are sometimes the best, so read on and if you think it’s really bad, you absolutely must […]