A lot of people love church jokes and that’s why we have had a collection of church jokes to bring you a mass of them here. I’m not going to preach, it’s up to you to do the reading. Here endeth the lesson.
An elderly woman walked into the local country church. The friendly usher greeted her at the door and helped her to walk up the flight of steps. “Where would you like to sit?” he asked her politely. “The front row, please”, she answered. “You really don’t want to do that”, […]
The Best Funny Church Jokes
48 posts
A lot of people love church jokes and that’s why we have had a collection of church jokes to bring you a mass of them here. I’m not going to preach, it’s up to you to do the reading. Here endeth the lesson.
Sorry about the church joke puns. Enjoy our collection of funny church jokes.
Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://pxhere.com/en/photo/323085
Gladys Dunn recently moved into a retirement community in a small town out West. One beautiful sunny Sunday morning, she walked down the street to a church that was not far from her apartment. Gladys admired the large beautiful church building with it’s impressive stained glass windows as she stepped […]
The church was preparing for the Christmas season and the pastor decided he wanted a Christmas banner made for the church entrance. The pastor had a parishioner call a company that made banners. The parishioner told the man on the phone the message he wanted and the dimensions needed for […]
One Sunday morning, before the church service began, a crippled man came into the church on crutches. He stopped in front of the holy water, sprinkled some on both legs and then threw away his crutches. An altar boy witnessed the scene and then ran into the rectory to tell […]
Mrs. O’Connor and her little daughter Maria were outside their local church watching a wedding, with the guests coming and going, all dressed in their finery. After the wedding photographs had been taken and everyone had driven off to the reception, Maria turned and asked her mother, “Why did the […]
Don’t you just love the way that children think, especially when it comes to church, religion, God and all that. These letters to their Pastor were written by young children from all over the USA and are a fascinating insight into the way that children’s minds work and in some […]
Father O’Reilly, the parish priest of a small church in the Chicago suburbs, received a call from the IRS. He answered the phone and the person at the other end asked, “Hello, is this Father O’Reilly?” “It is”, Father O’Reilly replied. “I am Jim Robertson and I am calling from […]
This story about an Explanation Of God was supposedly written by an 8 year old boy from Chula Vista in California for a third grade homework assignment, the topic being to “Explain God”. It’s amazing what children come up with and this story has some excellent points as well as […]
Feargus was in church attending the Sunday Mass when the time came for the offering plate to be passed around He quickly pulled out a one Euro coin from his pocket and dropped it into the offering plate. Just then, the person who was sitting behind him, tapped Feargus on […]
A minister was completing a Temperance sermon, telling the congregation at the church service in no uncertain terms all about the demon drink. With great emphasis, he called out to them, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river”. There […]
A teenage girl, complete with fake tan, eyelashes and eyebrows, went to church, knelt in the confessional box and said, “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned”. “What is it, my child?” the priest answered. The teenage girl said, “Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Twice a day […]
One Sunday morning, Ellen took a friend of hers, who was blind to church with her. While they were waiting for the Sunday service to begin, there were several children in the congregation who were fascinated with her friend’s Braille Bible. One of the adults came over to see what […]