A farmer’s wife was at her lawyer’s, seeking advice about getting a divorce. The lawyer asked her why she wanted to get a divorce, so the farmer’s wife replied, “My husband makes excessive sexual demands on me, Mr. Bakewell”. “How do you mean?” her lawyer asked, not having heard this […]
The Best Funny Chicken Jokes
Did you hear about the three hens? The first hen was normal. The second hen was dyslexic. The third was a nymphomaniac. Every morning, when the hens woke up, they would call out. The first hen said, “cocka doodle doo”. The second hen said, “doodle doodle cock”. The third hen […]
Did you hear the story of the Irishman, the Englishman and the egg? An Irishman kept a chicken and every morning he would look in his garden and pick up one of his chicken’s eggs for his breakfast. One morning, he looked into his garden and saw that the chicken […]
An attractive young woman walked into an accountant’s office and said to him “I need help to file my taxes”. The accountant said to her, “Well madam, before we begin, I will need to ask you a few questions”. He proceded to get her name, address, social security number and […]
A rooster was strutting around the farmyard one Easter morning in a typical arrogant manner as roosters do. He walked into the hen house and to his surprise he came across a nest of eggs that were dyed every color of the rainbow. The rooster took one look at the […]
This is for everyone out there who are kitchen challenged and don’t have a clue about cooking or food preparation. It’s called Cooking For Dummies! Some people make fine chefs and can conjure up the most amazing meals, but others really struggle in the kitchen. I’m somewhere in the middle, […]
I got into trouble at school today. Our class teacher asked me what my favorite animal was and I said, “Fried Chicken”. She said I wasn’t funny, but she couldn’t have been right, because everyone else in the class laughed out loud. My parents told me to always tell the […]
My brother thinks he is a chicken! Here’s a silly chicken joke to start the day off. Have a fantastic fun filled day everyone. Two men men go to see the doctor, the first man tells the doctor that the other man is his brother and he has a problem. […]
Murphy was getting more than a little peeved with the frequent visits that his wife was getting from her two nephews, who were both Jesuit priests. She had got into the habit of wining and dining them royally and on one occasion she practically forced Murphy to kill the two […]
A couple decided to go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant. They studied the menu and ordered the “Chicken Surprise” which sounded like a rather interesting dish. About twenty minutes later, the waiter brought out their meal, which has been served in a cast iron pot with a lid. […]
Murphy’s son Finan was returning from the local market, carrying a crate of chickens his father had entrusted to him. All of a sudden, the crate fell to the ground, the door came open and the chickens went running off in different directions. The young boy was mad at himself […]
A mouse looked through the crack in the farmhouse wall to see the farmer and his wife opening a package that was on the kitchen table. “What delicious food might this package contain?” the mouse thought to himself. He was in the mood for a delicious morsel of something. “Maybe […]