A very drunken man got on a London bus late one night. He staggered up the aisle and sat down next to an elderly woman. She looked the man up and down and said to him, “I’ve got news for you. You’re going straight to Hell!” The man immediately jumped […]
The Best Funny bus
8 posts
A drunk staggers on board a bus in Ireland and asks the driver how long the trip is between Limerick and Cork. “About 2 hours”, says the bus driver. “Okay”,says the drunk, “then how long is the trip between Cork and Limerick?” The irate bus driver says to the drunk, […]
A man was riding a bus, minding his own business, when a gorgeous woman boarded the bus, sat down next to him and started to breast feed her baby. The baby wouldn’t take it’s food, so the woman said, “Come on sweetie, drink it all up or I’ll have to […]
A little boy gets on board a London bus and sits down right behind the driver. He hasn’t been sitting there barely a minute when begins to speak: “If my mom was a cow and my dad was a bull, I’d be a little calf. If my mom was a […]
A girl who had recently become involved with equality for women, boarded a crowded bus. All the seats were taken on the bus, and as she stood there, a man rose to his feet. “No, No, you must not give up your seat. I insist”, she said. The man replied; […]
A priest and a bus driver both died and arrived at the Heaven at the same time. They get to the pearly gates where St. Peter greets them. He motions to the priest, and they both hop in a jeep and go out the back door, where the priest sees […]
Hamish asked the bus conductor how much the bus fare was into Glasgow city centre. “50p”, said the bus conductor. Hamish thought this was a bit much, so he decided to run behind the bus for a few stops. “How much is it now?”, he gasped. “Still 50p”, said the […]
Angela rides the bus to work every day. Today, however, she isn’t feeling too good, and she thinks to herself “Oh no, I really have to fart!” She is in a lot of discomfort because she has a pain in her lower abdomen. It’s a tremendous build up of gas […]
