One morning, a husband and wife were in the kitchen having an argument during breakfast. Having had enough fighting for one day, the husband, who was a doctor, got up from the table in a rage, said “And you are no good in bed either” and stormed out of the […]
The Best Funny Breakfast Jokes
14 posts
Have you tried lots of diets without success? Well, have you heard of the Miracle Cat Food Diet? Seriously, this could be the right diet for you! Most diets fail because we are still thinking and eating like people. For those of us who have never had any success dieting, […]
Over breakfast one day, a wife asked her husband what he would do if she were to suddenly die. The husband thought for a minute and then replied, “I would most likely die too”. Completely surprised at his answer, the wife asked him, “Why?” The husband replied, “Well, you know […]
Two elderly women were eating breakfast one morning at their care home. Margaret noticed something funny about June’s ear and she said, ‘”June, do you know you’ve got a suppository in your left ear?” June answered, “I have a suppository in my ear?” She pulled it out and stared at […]
The story below is an example of what all of us will probably have to look forward to when we start getting on in age, when we have to move out of our homes and spend our remaining years in an apartment with assisted living facilities. By that, I mean […]
A woman asked her husband if he would like some breakfast. “Bacon, eggs, perhaps some toast? Maybe a nice sectioned grapefruit and a cup of fresh coffee?” she asked, He declined, telling her, “It’s the Viagra, it’s really taken the edge off my appetite.” At lunchtime she again asked if […]
A West Virginia farmer and his recently hired farm hand were eating an early breakfast of biscuits and gravy, scrambled eggs, bacon and coffee that the farmer’s wife had prepared for them in the farm house. Thinking of all the work they had to get done that day, the farmer […]
When I left the office and went out to lunch today, I noticed that there was an old lady who looked to be in her mid seventies, who was sitting on a park bench outside the mall and she was sobbing her eyes out. I felt that I just had […]
This is bad Christmas joke, in fact it has to be one of the worst Christmas jokes ever, but if we didn’t include the bad jokes, there wouldn’t be much to laugh at would there! Here it is, so enjoy, or not as the case may be… A man decided […]
I was making my breakfast the other day and saw this message about recycling on a packet of Sainsbury’s cereal: If every Sainsbury’s customer recycled their cereal box, 750 tonnes of cardboard would be reused every year. That’s the equivalent to 101 double-decker buses! This message got me thinking – […]
We went to breakfast at a restaurant where the breakfast special was posted up on the chalkboard, consisting of two eggs, bacon, hash browns and sausage for $2.99. “That sounds good”, my wife said, “but I don’t want the eggs”. “I’m sorry Madam”, the waitress said, “I’ll have to charge […]
Here are some interesting facts about Southern women. I bet you didn’t know a lot of them, but if you read on I’m pretty sure you will find you actually did. Southern women appreciate their natural assets: Clean skin. A winning smile. That unforgettable Southern drawl. Southern women know their […]