A preacher walked into a bar and called out to all the customers who were busily engaged supping on their beers, “Anybody who wants to go to heaven, stand up”. Well, everybody in the bar stood up, except for a drunk who was standing over in the far corner. The […]
The Best Funny Bar Jokes
Murphy owned a furniture store in Dublin. His business was quite successful and he decided it would be a good idea to expand the line of furniture that he sold in his store. So he decided to take a trip to Paris to see what other items he could find […]
Roger was working away for a few days. It was Saturday evening, he was bored and to be honest he wished he had female company for the night. He went down to the hotel bar, which being a Saturday evening was fairly busy and he soon got chatting to a […]
A man walked into a bar, pulled up a stool, called the bartender over and ordered a shot of whisky. He gulped it down and then peeked into his shirt pocket. A few minutes later he ordered another shot of whisky, gulped it down and again peeked into his short […]
A man walked into a bar and said to the bartender, “Can I have a glass of your finest Less, please”. “Less? I’ve never heard of it”, the bartended replied. “Surely you have?” the man responded. “No, really, we don’t stock it”, the bartended replied. “What is it? Some kind […]
An Australian walked into a pub and stood there at the bar, happening to stand there beside a Scotsman. The two of them got chatting, as you do when you are standing at the bar in a pub and supping a few beers. The Scotsman was talking away with with […]
Have you heard about Annie Oakley’s sister? You haven’t? Well then, I guess today is going to be another school day for you if you care to read on. I guess everyone has heard about Annie Oakley, the famous sharp-shooter of the old Wild West. Annie Oakley toured the world […]
When you hear someone call out “Nine” as you walk past, you think it’s a good thing right? That’s not always strictly correct, as you will see from this short story. A man was meeting up with a friend in a bar, and as he walked in he noticed two […]
A man was out looking for a date and picked up a young woman in a bar. They got talking, hit it off and after a few drinks he persuaded her to come back to his hotel room with hm. They walked arm in arm to his hotel, which was […]
A drunk goes into a bar, walks up to the bartender and calls out, “Drinks for everyone, and one for you too”. The bartender serves everyone in the bar, including himself. “That will be fifty dollars, please”, he says to the drunk. “I don’t have any money”, the drunk says. […]
A blonde girl and her redhead friend met in a bar after work for a drink. While they were sitting there chatting, the 6 o’clock television news came on and showed a story of a man who was threatening to jump from the Brooklyn Bridge. The blonde girl bet the […]
Coffins, not the most pleasant of topics, but there you go. Here’s a good joke about coffins. It’s an old one but a good one. Three old Irish friends, Murphy, Paddy and Seamus, were sitting having a few beers in a bar and somehow the topic turned to dying. After […]