Next time you take a girl home for the first time, think carefully about how you unlock the door to your place. I know it sounds kind of weird, but read on and this will all make sense. It might even change your luck, you never know. So one night, […]
The Best Funny Apartment Jokes
19 posts
A Jewish grandmother was giving directions to her grandson who was on his way to visit her with his wife: “You come to the front door of the apartment complex. I am in apartment 12D. There is a big panel at the front door. With your elbow push button 12D. […]
A blonde woman suspects that her boyfriend is cheating on her, so she goes out and buys a gun. She then heads over to his apartment and to her surprise, when she opens the door she finds him in a compromising position in the arms of a redhead. Well, the […]
A guy met this amazingly beautiful girl in a bar and asked her, “May I buy you a drink?” “Okay”, she replied, “but it won’t do you any good”. So the guy bought her a drink and they sat and chatted for a while, during which he just couldn’t take […]
A woman was becoming worried about her next door neighbour, who was an elderly widow, because she hadn’t heard anything from her apartment in a few days. Concerned about her neighbour, she said to her son, “Harry, would you go next door and see how old Mrs. Richardson is?” A […]
There is an exclusive apartment building in Manhattan in which many United Nations representatives live, including a mysterious holy man from India, a mystic. A butcher, who had a flourishing business next to the apartment building, was constantly berated by the holy man for selling beef. Cattle, of course, are […]
Angus was a young Scotsman who decided to see what it would be like to live in Australia. He flew out to Sydney, where he found himself an apartment in Kings Cross and settled in. After a week or two, his mother called from Aberdeen to see how her son […]
To prepare for his big date with a hot blonde, the young man decided to go sunbathing in the nude on the roof of his apartment building, to try and look a little more tanned. Unfortunately, the young man fell asleep while on the roof, while lying on his back, […]
Helen inquired of the private detective that she had hired, “So, did you trail my husband last night?” “Yes madam, I did”. “And what happened?”, Helen asked him, naturally curious as to what her husband had been up to. The private detective replied, “I followed your husband to a bar, […]
The Irish Intelligence Agency lost track of one of its secret agents, so they call in their top spy hunter to try and locate him. The head of the Agency says to the spy hunter, “All I can tell you is that his name is Murphy and that he is […]
Douglas Manson is dying. He is lying on his deathbed, knows that the end is near, and the time has come to make his last wishes known. His nurse, his wife, his daughter, and two sons, are with him. He beckons to his wife, who comes to his bedside, and […]
The story below is an example of what all of us will probably have to look forward to when we start getting on in age, when we have to move out of our homes and spend our remaining years in an apartment with assisted living facilities. By that, I mean […]