Two Jewish men were having a meal in a Indian restaurant in New York. Moishe thought for a minute, then turned to his friend Abraham and asked, !Hey Abe, do you think there are there any people of our faith who were born and raised in India?” Abraham replied, “I […]
The Best Funny Abraham Jokes
8 posts
Are you ready for some Abraham jokes?
Good old Abraham, one of the first men in the Old Testament and featured in many jokes over the centuries. Actually, Abraham has probably been featured in hundreds of jokes since mankind learned to talk. He was probably featured in the first Joke Book that came hot off the Gutenburg’s printing press!
Of course there are other people called Abraham, including Abraham Lincoln. We have jokes about him too.
We hope you enjoy this hand-picked selection of jokes about Abraham and if you have heard them before, that’s because they are old, like Abraham.
Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://pixabay.com/photos/cyprus-kelia-ayios-antonios-church-1363192/
A Jewish American couple were on vacation in the Holy Land and sitting having a coffee outside a souvenir shop in Bethlehem. While they were sitting there drinking their coffee, an Arab gentleman came up to them, carrying a bunch of leather belts and he did his best to try […]
A young couple were worried about their three year old son’s physical development, so they took him to see doctor Abraham. With some hesitation and embarrassment, they explained that although their little angel appeared to be in good health and generally developing well, they were rather concerned about his rather […]
A few hundred years ago, the Pope made a decree that all the Jews must leave Italy. There was, as you can imagine, a huge outcry from the Jewish community, so the Pope proposed a deal. He would have a religious debate with a leader of the Jewish community. If […]
When old Abraham died, his will provided $50,000 to pay for an elaborate funeral. After the burial, as the last of the guests departed the cemetery, his wife, Sarah, turned to her oldest friend, Naomi. “Well, I’m sure Abraham would be pleased”, she said. “I’m sure you’re right”, Naomi replied. […]
Two Jewish men were strolling down the street one day when they happened to walk past a Catholic church. Outside the church was a large sign that said, “Convert to Catholicism and get $100”. One of the Jewish men stopped walking and stared at the sign. His friend turned to […]
A regular customer at Abraham’s Gourmet Grocery store in Manhattan marveled at the proprietor’s quick wit and intelligence. “Tell me, Abraham, just what is it that makes you so smart?” “I wouldn’t share my secret with just anyone”, Abraham replied, lowering his voice so the other shoppers couldn’t hear, “But […]
Old Abraham, a Jewish man, had reached the end of his days and was dying. His family had gathered in his bedroom and were all standing around his bed to pay their respects and to be there when he passed over. Lying there on his deathbed, he looked up and […]