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Large Ugly Woman

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I was in a sleazy bar on the wrong side of town last night, standing at the bar waiting for a beer, when this large ugly woman came up behind me and slapped me on the butt.

She said, “Hey sexy, I really dig old men, how about giving me your number.”

I looked at her and she was really butt ugly, what you might call “fugly”, and she was mean looking too.

I said to her, “Have you got a pen.”

She said, “I sure do.”

I said, “Well, you better get back into it before the farmer notices you’re missing.”

I made an appointment with the dentist, my surgery is on Monday.

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