This is the story of an trip that an Italian American couple from New York took by train from Grand Central Station to Florida.
This was a really special trip for them, the trip of a lifetime, because it was their honeymoon.
After returning from his honeymoon in Florida with his new bride, Virginia, Luigi stopped by his old barber shop in New Jersey to say hello to his friends.
Giovanni said, “Hey Luigi, how wasa da treep?”
Luigi said, “Everyting wasa perfecto except for da train ride down.”
“Whata you mean, Luigi?” asked Giovanni.
“Well, we boarda da train at Grana Central Station. My beautiful Virginia, she pack a biga basket a food. She broughta da vino, some nice cigars for me, and we were lookina forward to da trip.
Everyting wasa Okey Dokey till we getta hungry and open upa da luncha basket. The conductore comea by, wagga his finger at us anda say, ‘no eat indisa car. Musta use a dining car.’
“So, me and my beautiful Virginia, we go to a dining car, eat a biga lunch and starta ta open da bottle of a nice a vino!
Conductore walka by again, wagga his finger and say, ‘No drinka in disa car! Musta use a cluba car.’
“So, we go to cluba car. While a drinkina da vino, I starta to lighta my biga cigar. The conductore, he waga his finger again and say, ‘No a smokina disa car. Musta go to a smokina car.’
“We go to a smokina car and I smoke a my biga cigar. Then my beautiful Virginia and I, we go to a sleeper car anda go to bed.
We just about to go boombada and the conductore, he walka through da hall shouting ata da top of his a voice…………….. ‘Nofolka Virginia! Nofolka Virginia!’
“Nexta time, I’ma just gonna take a da bus!!
Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://www.flickr.com/photos/dila1337/41831649245