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In Bed With Her Lover

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A woman was lying in bed with her lover when suddenly she heard her husband opening the front door downstairs.

“Hurry”, she said to him, “stand over here in the corner of the bedroom”.

She proceded to rub baby oil all over her lover, then dusted him over with talcum powder.

“Don’t move until I tell you”, the woman said, “stand there and pretend you are a statue”.

The woman quickly got some clothes out of her wardrobe and made out as if she was getting changed, just as she heard her husband’s footsteps coming up the stairs.

“What’s this?” her husband inquired as he entered the bedroom.

“Oh it’s a statue”,” his wife replied. “The Smiths bought one and I liked it so I got one for us too. What do you think?”

Her husband just nodded and no more was said, not even when they went to bed later that evening.

Around 2am, her husband got up out of bed, went down to the kitchen and returned with a few minutes later with a sandwich and a beer.

“Here”, he said to the statue, “have this. I stood like that for two days at the Smiths and nobody offered me a damned thing”.

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