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I Really Have To Fart!

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Angela rode the bus to work every day., but on this particular day however, she wasn’t feeling too good and she thought to herself “Oh no, I really have to fart!”

She was in a lot of discomfort because she had a pain in her lower abdomen. There was a tremendous build up of gas from something she ate last night and no matter how embarrassing it might be, she knew that the inevitable was going to happen. It was clear that there was no way that she was going to be able to prevent it and sooner or later she was going to have to let it go.

However, the bus was quite crowded and she poor Angela didn’t know what to do. The last thing that she wanted to do was totally embarrass herself.

Then, she remembered that pretty soon the bus would be running across some railroad tracks and it would rattle and bang and make lots of noise. She would be able to have a good fart then and nobody would be any the wiser.

What she didn’t know though, is that the bus driver also rode the bus everyday and he had grown tired of all the noise the bus made when it rattled and banged across the railroad tracks. So, the night before he stayed late after work and had the maintenance crew tighten up all the loose bolts and lubricate all the moving parts to quiet down the old bus.

Well, as they approached the railroad tracks, Angela raised up on one cheek and let it rip. It was one long, loud, juicy sounding fart, a real ripsnorter.

However, the bus didn’t rattle and bang like it usually did and now you could hear a pin drop inside the bus as everybody started looking around to see who it was that had let out that awesome rip.

Angela hoped that maybe no one knew who did it and that she should just act natural.

She thought that it might help if she just started a conversation with someone as if nothing had happened. So, she leaned over to the man sitting across the aisle from her and casually asked him, “Do you have a bus ticket?”

The man politely responded, “No madam I don’t, but if it will help, the next tree we pass I will try and grab you a handful of leaves….”

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