Mrs. Sullivan returned home to to Ireland from a vacation to France where she had taken a class in French Cooking.
She tells her husband Seamus that she is going to prepare him a special meal for St. Valentine’s Day, and that he is to go down to Murphy’s Market and buy two dozen escargot, which she explains to Paddy are snails.
Mrs. Sullivan sternly tells Seamus to come straight home and that there should be no stops at the pub.
Well Seamus buys the snails and is on his way home, but alas his route takes him right past his favorite pub, and he can’t bring himself to walk on by without stopping for a pint.
Just one he tells himself.
Well, perhaps another he says after having the first pint.
The company is good, the tales are tall, and Seamus finds himself having three or four pints, and the time passes…
As Seamus heads home he realizes it has become dark, and knows his lovely wife will be waiting and sharpening her tongue for him, never a pleasant experience, as Seamus rightly knows.
As he opens the gate to his home the porch light comes on, and he hears the door begin to open.
Quickly, Seamus empties the bag of escargot on the ground, and says in a loud voice “Come on now lads! You’re almost there.”
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