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Doctor Johnson

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Doctor Johnson had the reputation of helping couples to increase the joy in their sex life. However, he promised only to take a case if he felt that he could help a couple who came to him to try and find a solution to their problems.

The Browns came to see the doctor as they felt that their sex life had become rather mundane and boring over the years.

He gave them thorough physical exams, psychological exams, and various tests, then concluded, “Yes, I am happy to say that I believe I can help you”.

Doctor Johnson continued, “On your way home from my office, stop at the grocery store and buy some grapes and some doughnuts. Go home, take off your clothes, and you, sir, roll the grapes across the floor until you make a bull’s-eye in your wife’s love canal. Then, on your hands and knees, you must crawl to her like a leopard and retrieve the grape using only your tongue”.

The doctor continued with his instructions for the couple, “Next ma’am, you must take the doughnuts, and from across the room, toss them at your husband until you make a ringer around his love pole. Then like a lioness, you must crawl to him and consume the doughnut”.

Well, the couple went home, did what Doctor Johnson had asked, and their sex life became more and more wonderful over the coming months.

The Browns had their friends the Potters round for dinner one evening.

The discussion turned to their sex lives, and the Potters let on that they had become really disappointed with theirs lately.

The Browns suggested that they should see the good doctor.

The doctor greeted the Potters and said he would not take the case unless he felt that he could help them.

So he conducted the physical exams and the same battery of tests that he gave the Browns.

Then he told the Potters the bad news. “I cannot help you, so I will not take your money. I believe your sex life is as good as it will ever be. I am sorry, but I cannot help you”.

The Potters pleaded with him and begged him to help them, “You helped our friends the Browns and now they have an amazing sex life. Please, please, please can you help us”.

“Well, all right”, the doctor said.

“On your way home from the office, stop at the grocery store and buy some apples and a box of cheerios…”

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