Here’s a cool list of definitions for parents of young children and babies.
If you are a parent, I can practically bet that you will identify with at least one of these definitions, if not more, maybe the whole lot!
Being a parent, you are almost certain to come up with new definitions, based on the new experiences your children open you up to, and the many ways in which they surprise you, some good and some not so good.
But enough waffle, here are the definitions. If you have any more, please leave a comment:
- DUMBWAITER: one who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.
- FEEDBACK: the inevitable result when the baby doesn’t appreciate the strained carrots.
- FULL NAME: what you call your child when you’re mad at him.
- GRANDPARENTS: the people who think your children are wonderful even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right.
- HEARSAY: what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.
- INDEPENDENT: how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.
- OW: the first word spoken by children with older siblings.
- PUDDLE: a small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry shoes into it.
- SHOW OFF: a child who is more talented than yours.
- STERILIZE: what you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it, and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it and wiping it with saliva.
- TOP BUNK: where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.
- TWO-MINUTE WARNING: when the baby’s face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.
- VERBAL: able to whine in words
- WHODUNIT: none of the kids that live in your house.