Children’s Bill Of Rights

Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://www.needpix.com/photo/529831/teenager-boy-young-people-youth-child-young-man-son-german-europeansTeenagers can be obnoxious can’t they. This is the response a Mother had when her teenage sone started banging on about the Children’s Bill Of Rights.

My son came home from school one day,
with a smirk upon his face.
He decided he was smart enough,
to put me in my place.

“Guess what I learned in Civics Two,
that’s taught by Mr. Wright?
It’s all about the laws today,
The “Children’s Bill of Rights”.

It says I need not clean my room,
don’t have to cut my hair.
No one can tell me what to think,
or speak, or what to wear.

I have freedom from religion,
and regardless what you say,
I don’t have to bow my head,
and I sure don’t have to pray.

I can wear earrings if I want,
and pierce my tongue and nose.
I can read and watch just what I like,
and get tattoos from head to toes.

And if you ever spank me,
I’ll charge you with a crime.
I’ll back up all my charges,
with the marks on my behind.

Don’t you ever touch me,
My body’s only for my use,
not for your hugs and kisses,
that’s just more child abuse.

Don’t preach about your morals,
like your Mama did to you.
That’s nothing more than mind control,
And it’s illegal too!

Mom, I have these children’s rights,
so you can’t influence me,
or I’ll call Children’s Services Division,
better known as C.S.D.

Of course my first instinct was
To toss him out the door.
But the chance to teach him a lesson
made me think a little more.

I mulled it over carefully,
I couldn’t let this go.
A smile crept upon my face,
he’s messing with a pro.

The next day I took him shopping
at the local Goodwill Store.
I told him, “Pick out all you want,
there’s shirts and pants galore.

I’ve called and checked with C.S.D.
who said they didn’t care
if I bought you K-Mart shoes
instead of Nike Air.

And I’ve canceled that appointment
to take your driver’s test.
The C.S.D. is unconcerned
so I’ll decide what’s best.

Forget that part time job you took
to put gas into a car.
I’ve decided that your bike
will get you just as far.

I said “No time to stop and eat,
or pick up stuff to munch.
And tomorrow you can start to learn
to make your own packed lunch.

Just save the raging appetite
and wait till dinner time.
We’re having liver and onions,
a favorite dish of mine.

He asked “Can I please rent a movie,
to watch on my VCR?”
“Sorry, but I sold your TV,
to put new tires on my car.”

I also rented out your room,
you’ll take the couch instead.
All the C.S.D. requires
is a roof for over your head.

Your clothing won’t be trendy now,
and I’ll choose what we eat.
That allowance that you used to get,
will buy me something neat.

Wifi and cell phone are a luxury,
neither was a guarantee,
I cancelled both this afternoon
call C.S.D. to whine, not me.

I’m selling off your jet ski,
dirt-bike and roller blades.
Check out the “Parents Bill of Rights,”
It’s in effect today!

All that money that I saved
for your college education,
will now be used by Dad and I
to go on great vacations!

Hey hot shot, are you crying,
and why are you on your knees?
Are you asking God
to help you out, instead of C.S.D.?


Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://www.needpix.com/photo/529831/teenager-boy-young-people-youth-child-young-man-son-german-europeans

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