This is a story about retirement in South Florida. I don’t know who wrote the original version of this and suspect it’s been embellished over the years. I have done my own editing as well to try and give a feel of the experience of being retired and living in […]
The Best Collection Of Old People Jokes
Two elderly friends used to meet in the local park every day, where they would feed the pigeons, watch the squirrels and discuss the problems of the world, as you do. One day, Colin, one of the friends, didn’t show up in the park. Harry didn’t think much about it […]
Margaret and Janet were old friends and they had both been married to their husbands for a long time. One day, Margaret and Janet were talking and Margaret said that she was upset because she thought her husband didn’t find her attractive any more. “As I get older he doesn’t […]
A wise old man retired and moved to a modest home that was near to a junior high school, seeking some peace and quiet in his older years. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment, then the new school year began. The very next […]
You know you are getting older when… Your doctor doesn’t give you x-rays anymore but just holds you up to the light. A hot looking girl catches your eye and your pacemaker opens the garage door nearest you. You remember when the Dead Sea was only sick. Your wife says, […]
Murphy was well known to be a grumpy old man. He complained about everything and everyone. Murphy was what you might call a “right miserable old sod”. When Murphy had to go to the hospital for minor surgery, he never stopped criticizing the room, the food, the noise, literally everything. […]
I just took a leaflet out of my mailbox, which informed me that I can have sex at 73. You can’t begin to imagine how happy this made me, because I live at number 71. So it’s not far to go and it’s also not too far to walk home […]
This is Grandma’s letter that I received in the mail yesterday and I still haven’t stopped laughing. You see, Gramdma is 88 years old and still drives her own car. This is what she wrote: Dear Grand-daughter, The other day I went up to our local Christian book store and […]
A retired gentleman went into the Social Security office to apply for Social Security benefits. After waiting in line a long time he eventually got to the counter. The woman behind the counter asked him for his drivers license to verify his age. He looked in his pockets and realized […]
It started off as a fairly typical Saturday evening in the nursing home. The usual run of the mill game of bingo, followed by a sing-a-long afterwards. An old man, who was feeling rather frisky, given his advanced years, looked over and said to the old lady sitting next to […]
When his health began to fail after he retired, Bill’s doctor recommended that he moved to somewhere healthier to live. So, after some research about places that were hot and cold, wet and dry, even inland or on the coast, Bill decided to move to a small town in Texas. […]
As I sat waiting for my appointment in the doctor’s reception area, a woman rolled an elderly man in a wheelchair into the waiting room. When she walked over to the receptionist’s desk, the man just sat there, alone and silent. Just as I was thinking that maybe I should […]