These are funny jokes about marriage, getting married, weddings and married life. We have a great collection of the best marriage jokes here for you to enjoy.
Don’t you just love it when it’s the middle of the night, you are fast asleep and the phone rings! It was two o’clock in the morning and a husband and wife were fast asleep, when suddenly the phone rang, waking them both up with a jolt. The husband picked […]
Jokes in category: Marriage Jokes
122 posts
These are funny jokes about marriage, getting married, weddings and married life. We have a great collection of the best marriage jokes here for you to enjoy.
This category also includes a number of jokes and funny stories about love, dating and relationships, which are of course what leads up to marriage and married life, or sometimes brings about it’s downfall.
We have funny stories about people getting married, with tales of the wedding going wrong and the honeymoon not turning out like they expected.
We also have plenty of jokes about living together and of course that most dreaded of all creatures, the Mother-In-Law!
As a wise old man once said to me (true story), “The secret to a happy marriage is in two little words – Yes Dear!”
I hope you enjoy our collection of funny material about married life.
It was his wife’s 40th birthday and Liam watched as Elizabeth waltzed out of the bedroom, dressed in an old outfit that she dug out of the back of the closet. “I wore this on my 30th birthday! I guess that means my wardrobe is ten years old”, she said […]
It doesn’t always pay to be a cheapskate, especially if it’s your wedding day and the pastor isn’t one to be taken for a ride. There was this cheapskate who would always try and avoid paying his debts if he could. After dating a young lady for some time the […]
This is a sweet story about a man who purchased a pocket Taser for his lovely wife as a wedding anniversary present. What on earth posessed him to buy his wife such an anniversary gift we will never know, but he did and lived to tell the tale. This is […]
With a very seductive voice the sensual wife asked her husband, “Have you ever seen $20 all crumpled up?” “No”, said her husband, wondering what she had up her sleeve, so to speak. She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse, […]
A woman was really ripping into her husband with even more than her usual dose of venom, telling him, “You’re an idiot!” She continued having a go at him, really putting him down with, “You have always been an idiot. You’ll always be an idiot. If they had an idiot […]
Bob and his wife were at a Marriage Seminar, where the topic for the way was dealing with communication. Bob and his wife Louise listened to the instructor, who was stressing how important it was that husbands and wives know each other’s likes and dislikes. The instructor motioned to Bob […]
At a barbecue party, a couple were chatting with some guests when the topic of marriage counselling came up. The wife very pompously commented, “Oh we will never need marriage counselling. My husband and I have an excellent relationship”. In response to the stares and looks of surprise from the […]
A husband came home one day to find that his bride had disappeared. His wife had literally vanished. He got very worried, especially as they had only been married for a few months, so he contacted all of his friends to help search for his wife. Sadly, despite having searched […]
A husband and wife are having marital problems, so they arrange an appointment with a marriage counselor. First, the wife goes in and speaks to the counselor alone. The counselor asks her, “You say you have been married for 20 years, so what seems to be the problem?” The wife […]
