On Saturday night I took my wife to a disco, something we hadn’t done in a long time. Well, there was this guy on the dance floor, and he was definitely giving it the old John Travolta from Saturday Night Fever. He was breakdancing, going somersaults and backflips, even moonwalking. […]
Jokes in category: Marriage
20 posts
My wife has always wanted a fur jacket, and to be honest, while I have wanted to buy her one, just looking at the price tag has been enough to give me a mild heart attack. Well, last week I was walking past a clothing store, and I saw this […]
Harold had just finished eating his breakfast and as usual was sitting at the kitchen table reading the daily paper. He came across an article about an actress who was about to marry a football player, known primarily for his lack of IQ and common knowledge, as well as for […]
Fiona and Eric were due to be married in a few months, and the time had come for Fiona to look for a wedding dress. As with every young bride, she wanted to look stunning on her wedding day, and after much searching through all the bridal shops in the […]
Margaret’s husband had an annoying habit of searching through the refrigerator for a snack, usually while she was preparing their evening meal. This used to really agravate her, especially as she had often slaved over a hot stove for hours to prepare him a lovely meal, and she knew that […]
I came home from playing golf one day, only to find that my wife had left a note on the fridge. The note read: “It’s not working! I can’t take it anymore! I’ve gone to stay with my Mother.” So I did what any man would do in that situation… […]
Do you ever get those days when you just seem to get on the wrong side of your wife? I do, and today was one of those days. I arrived home from work at 5 pm as I usually do, only to find that this wasn’t one of her better […]
Michael and Denise had only been married a few months when he came home from work to be greeted with “Honey, I have a surprise for you”. “Oh”, said Michael, “what’s that sweetheart?” “It’s great news”, Denise said, “very soon there will be three people living in this house instead […]
A few days before her birthday a husband asked his wife, “Darling, what would you like for your birthday present?” Wife: “I really don’t think I should say”. Husband: “Well, how about a diamond ring?” Wife: “You know I don’t care much for diamonds”. Husband: “How about a mink coat […]
An elderly couple went for a stroll in the park and after a while they sat down on a bench to rest. Just then they overheard voices coming from a secluded spot nearby. Suddenly the woman realized that a young man was about to propose to his girlfriend. Not wanting […]
Wanting to try and get more up to date on technology, a middle-aged couple finally learned how to send and receive texts on their cell phones. Gloria, who always thought of herself as a bit of a romantic at heart, decided one day while she was out shopping that she […]
Although we had planned to get married in New Hampshire, I wanted to add a touch of home from the state of Kansas where I grew up, to our wedding. My fiancee, explained this to a friend, and told him that we were planning to have wheat rather than rice […]
He didn’t like the casserole And he didn’t like my cake, He said my biscuits were too hard Not like his mother used to make. I didn’t perk the coffee right He didn’t like the stew, I didn’t mend his socks The way his mother used to do. I pondered […]
Harold feared that his wife Dorothy wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he thought that if she was going deaf that she might need a hearing aid. He wasn’t quite sure how to approach her, and so he telephoned the family Doctor to discuss the problem with […]
My wife is a registered nurse, and once upon a time she fussed over every pain or mishap that I had. Recently, however, I got an indication that the honeymoon is over. I was about to fix the fan in the attic, and as I lifted myself from the ladder […]