A husband and wife were having dinner at a very fine restaurant, when this absolutely stunning young woman came over to their table, gave the husband a great big kiss, then said she would see him later and walked away. Heads turned in the restaurant as the woman walked across […]
Jokes in category: Marriage
63 posts
Ah yes, married life! Where would we be without jokes about married life and the ups and downs of being chained to a spouse.
Well there would be no Mother-in-law jokes for a start, or wedding jokes, and no funny wedding videos.
I hope you enjoy our collection of funny material about married life.
Barbara’s husband was in a hospital bed and he was in a coma. The doctors weren’t really sure what was wrong with him, but he had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months. Things looked grim, but Barbara was by his bedside every single day. One […]
A couple who had been married for a few years were out working in the garden together one sunny afternoon. As the wife was bending over pulling weeds, the husband said, “Hey honey, you are getting fat. Your arse is getting huge. It’s starting to resemble an elephant’s arse. I […]
“I’m worried that I’m losing my wife’s love,” the husband told the counsellor. “Has she started to neglect you?”, the counsellor asked him. “Not at all,” the dejected man replied. “She meets me at the door with a cold drink and a warm kiss. My shirts are always ironed, she’s […]
A young man calls his Mother and excitedly tells her that he has fallen in love, and he is going to get married. “Just for fun, Mom, I’m going to bring three women over to your house, and you have to try and guess which one of them I am […]
On their wedding night, the young bride told her groom, “Since we are married now, we can arrange our sex life like this: In the evening if my hair is done, that means I don’t want sex at all. If my hair is somewhat undone, that means I may or […]
Some friends of ours invited the wife and I out to dinner at a new restaurant in town, where the servers are all topless. Although this wasn’t exactly to my wife’s taste, she was a pretty good sport and pretended to enjoy the evening. On the way home though, the […]
Some marriages work, while others don’t, which is great if yours does work, but life can be hell if you are in a marriage that just isn’t working. Fortunately, my wife and I have found the secret to making a marriage work, and we do (for the most part at […]
A judge was interviewing a lady regarding her pending divorce and asked her, “What are the grounds for your divorce?” She replied, “About four acres and a nice little home in the middle of the property with a stream running by.” “No,” the judge said, “I mean what is the […]
A man was taking his last breaths on his deathbed, his wife was maintaining a vigil by his side. She held his fragile hand, and tears ran down her face. Her praying momentarily aroused him from his slumber. He looked up at her, and his pale lips began to move […]