Jokes in category:  Lawyer Jokes

32 posts

Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.needpix.com/photo/21837/lawyer-black-and-white-person-practicing-attorney-counsel-solicitor-justice-judiciary

This is our collection of Lawyer Jokes, hand picked from hundreds of lawyer jokes to give you just the very best humour about the legal profession.

Lawyers are supposed to be trustworthy servants of the government, but all too often they are crooked and as a result the topic for many legal jokes.

We give you the lawyers, the judge, jury, defence and the prosecution, witnesses and of course we can’t forget the villains.

So, are these the very best lawyer jokes? The truth or not the truth. We kid you not.


Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.needpix.com/photo/21837/lawyer-black-and-white-person-practicing-attorney-counsel-solicitor-justice-judiciary

Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.pickpik.com/hammer-horizontal-court-justice-right-law-127978

Law Firm

Billy needed a lawyer, so he searched on Google and picked out an important sounding law firm called “Schwartz, Schwartz, Schwartz & Schwartz”. He called the law firm up up and asked, “Is Mr. Schwartz in?” The man who answered said, “No, he’s out playing golf”. Billy replied, “Ah ok, […]

Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://www.flickr.com/photos/118118485@N05/36848593650

Divorce Court

Marjorie stood up before the judge in the divorce court. Judge: “You have asked for a divorce decree from this court. Madam, is that right?” Marjorie: “Yes Your Honor”. Judge: “And the grounds for your request is that your husband is too careless about his appearance. Is that correct?” Marjorie: […]

Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.flickr.com/photos/calinjurylawyer/21459680054

Never Trust A Lawyer

This story is a simple example of why you should never trust a lawyer. A butcher saw a lawyer passing by his shop one day, and asked him, “What would you do if a dog came in and stole your meat?” The lawyer replied, “Well, I would make the owner […]

Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://pixabay.com/illustrations/judge-court-gavel-administration-4199434/

Judge And Juror

When the court case was about to begin, the Judge asked one of the Jurors “Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case?” The Juror replied, “I don’t want to be away from my job that long, your honor”. The Judge then asked him, […]