Jokes in category:  Lawyer Jokes

31 posts

Lawyers are supposed to be trustworthy servants of the government, but all too often they are crooked and as a result the topic for many legal jokes.

This is our collection of lawyer jokes, hand picked from hundreds of lawyer jokes to give you just the very best humour about the legal profession.

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Divorce Court

Marjorie stood up before the judge in the divorce court. Judge: “You have asked for a divorce decree from this court. Madam, is that right?” Marjorie: “Yes Your Honor”. Judge: “And the grounds for your request is that your husband is too careless about his appearance. Is that correct?” Marjorie: […]

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Never Trust A Lawyer

This story is a simple example of why you should never trust a lawyer. A butcher saw a lawyer passing by his shop one day, and asked him, “What would you do if a dog came in and stole your meat?” The lawyer replied, “Well, I would make the owner […]

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Investment Counselor

A successful investment counselor decided to go out on her own and set up her own financial counseling company. Since she was shrewd and diligent, the company became very popular, and business kept building up until she realized that she needed an an assistant counselor. So, she put out some […]

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Voluntary Manslaughter

A prospective jury in a Dallas District Court were surprised by the definition of voluntary manslaughter that they were given, prior to their being selected for a murder trial. Voluntary Manslaughter is an intentional killing that occurs while the defendant is under the immediate influence of sudden passion, arising from […]

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Judge And Juror

When the court case was about to begin, the Judge asked one of the Jurors “Is there any reason you could not serve as a juror in this case?” The Juror replied, “I don’t want to be away from my job that long, your honor”. The Judge then asked him, […]

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New Lawyers

There I was, minding my own business when a female business associate came out of her office with two guys. “Hi, Rob”, she said, “have you met our new lawyers? This is Daniel Abraham, David Greenberg and Michael Hunt”. I was confused, there were only two guys with her, so […]