A Jewish mother is walking down the street with her two young sons. A passer by stops her and asks her how old the two boys are. “The doctor is three”, the mother answers, “and the lawyer is two”. Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.pxfuel.com/en/free-photo-ejxfe
The Best Collection Of Jewish Jokes
31 posts
Two Jewish men are strolling down the street one day when they happen to walk by a Catholic church. They see a big sign that says, “Convert to Catholicism and get $100”. One of the Jewish men stops walking and stares at the sign. His friend turns to him and […]
Many years ago, a Jewish lady was stranded late one night on Cape Cod in Massachusetts. There was no way that she was going to be able to make it home that night. It was too late to call a cab, but fortunately there was a fashionable resort just across […]
Miriam was bragging to her next-door neighbor Esther, about her son who was a student at university. “Why, our son is so brilliant, every time we get a letter from him we have to go to the dictionary”, Miriam said. “You are lucky”, Esther replied. “Every time we get a […]
The Jewish people do have a knack of coming up with some wonderful proverbs and other witty sayings. Here are some wonderful Yiddish proverbs: If the rich could hire other people to die for them, the poor could make a wonderful living. The wise man, even when he holds his […]
A couple are preparing for a religious conversion to the Jewish religion, and they meet with the orthodox rabbi for their final session before the ceremony. The rabbi asks them if they have any final questions before they convert to the Jewish religion. The man asks the rabbi, “Is it […]
Two beggars are sitting side by side on a street in Rome. One has a cross in front of him, the other has the Star of David. It’s a busy street with many people passing by, who stop to look at both beggars, but only put money into the hat […]
During a regular early morning temple service, Rabbi Levy couldn’t help noticing that 21 year old Benny was sitting at the back of the shul looking very sad. He had his head in his hands. So at a convenient moment, Rabbi Levy goes over to him and asks, “What’s wrong, […]
Mordechai goes to consult a world famous specialist about his medical problem. After the visit Mordechai asks, “How much do I owe you?” “My fee is five hundred dollars,” replies the physician. “Five hundred dollars? That’s impossible. No one charges that much!” “In your case,” the doctor replies, “I suppose […]
A Jewish man pays a visit to the Rabbi, “Rabbi, something terrible is happening and I have to talk to you about it.” The Rabbi asked, “What’s wrong?” The man replied, “My wife is poisoning me.” The Rabbi, very surprised by this, asks, “How can that be? Surely you must […]
