Murphy’s wife purchased a new line of expensive cosmetics that she saw advertised on television and which guaranteed to make her look years younger. After spending a long time sitting in front of the mirror applying her “miracle” cosmetic products, she asked Murphy, “Darling, honestly, what age would you say […]
The Best Collection Of Irish Jokes
172 posts
We have the biggest and best funny Irish Jokes collection on the web in 2020 with more than 170 of the best Irish Jokes and it’s growing bigger every week.
We have jokes about your favourite Irishmen, Mick (Michael) and Paddy (Patrick) as well as jokes about Seamus and Sean, Feargus and more. We also have jokes about your favourite Irish lassies, Bridgette, Siobhan etc.
On The Laughline you can find stories about Leprechauns, and of course lots of stories about beer, Guinness, whisky and getting drunk, all good Irish stuff.
Don’t miss our tribute to St. Patrick’s Day with a collection of St. Patrick themed limericks and poems.
Everyone loves a good Irish joke, so pour yourself a Guinness or a shot of Jameson’s, have a laugh on us, and please share the jokes if you enjoy them.
The owner of some commercial properties in Dublin had three shops available for rent. The three shops were all in a row on the same street. He placed an advertisement in the local paper and the very next day, prospective clients who wanted to rent the properties turned up to […]
Murphy had an interview for a job at a local chemical factory. The department manager asked him, “Have you worked with chemicals before?” “Yes sure”, Murphy replied. The manager then asked him, “Can you tell me what nitrate is?” Murphy replied “Well I’m hoping its going to be time and […]
There was an old priest from a church in Cork in the south of Ireland who enjoyed a drink of liquor now and then, but his real passion was peach brandy. Feargus, who had been a member of his congregation for many years, would give the priest a bottle of […]
Paddy and Murphy were working on a construction site that was a few miles away from home and they were staying in a hotel. They got up in the morning and Paddy went in the bathroom to take a shower before going down to breakfast. Murphy shouted out to him, […]
Seamus and Patrick are walking through the woods when they came across this big deep hole in the ground. Now this didn’t look like any ordinary hole in the ground. It was really big and it also looked like it was really really deep as well. “Wow that hole looks […]
Patrick came home from work one day with not one but two black eyes. “What in bejazus happened to you?” his wife asked him. “I will never understand women”, Patrick replied. “I was going up an escalator behind this pretty young girl and I noticed that her skirt was stuck […]
Murphy was standing at the bar in his local pub in Ireland when this small Chinese guy came in, stood next to him and started drinking a beer. Murphy asked him, “Do you know any of those martial arts things, like Kung-Fu, Karate or Ju-Jitsu?” The man said, “No, why […]
Murphy and Patrick found three hand grenades. They weren’t sure what to do with them, but decided it was best to take them to the police station. Patrick said, “Hang on a minute, what if one of those hand grenades explodes before we get there?” Murphy replied, “No problem Patrick. […]
Baggy shorts or Speedos? What’s your preference when going to the beach? Baggy shorts might be more comfortable, but those European men in their Speedos sure know how to pull the girls. An Irishman was vacationing in Miami, Florida and could not understand why his friend Jean Paul from France […]
