It was a record breaking hot sunny day and Murphy decided to go sunbathing naked at the beach in Galway. For the sake of civility and to keep it from getting sunburned, he placed his hat over his private parts. Mrs O’Sullivan walked past him and said with a laugh, […]
Jokes in category: Irish Jokes
Murphy goes into the confessional box one Sunday and has the surprise of his life. One wall of the confessional is a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On the other wall is a dazzling array of the finest Cuban cigars. Then the priest, Father McCarthy comes in. “Father, […]
Murphy visits a creepy old castle in County Kerry and decides to go on a guided tour. The guide was dressed up in period costume from the 1600’s, really looked the part and certainly knew a lot about the old castle, making it’s history come to life. Several hours later […]
One day, a beautiful young English woman arrived at Murphy’s house in a stretch limousine and asked if he would paint her in the nude. Now Murphy, who lived in a small town in County Clare in Ireland, while not a brilliant scholar, was a hugely gifted portrait artist. Over […]
Sean purchased a new car, but the very next day he went back to the dealer from whom he bought it. “I believe you gave me a guarantee with my car”, he said. “That’s right, sir,” said Murphy, the salesman. “During the warranty period we will replace anything that breaks”. […]
As soon as she had finished parochial school in Ireland, Siobhan who was a bright young girl, made her way to New York, where before long she became a successful performer in show business. Eventually she returned to her home town for a visit and on a Saturday night went […]
Paddy picks something up from off the floor and says to Mick, “Hey Michael, I found this pen, is it yours?” Mick replies, I don’t know Paddy, give it here so I can take a look”. He then tries it then he says, “Yes it is, thanks Paddy”. Paddy asks […]
A man was on a walking holiday in Ireland. While he was walking through the wonderful Irish countryside one fresh Spring day, he became rather thirsty, so he decided to stop at a little cottage and ask for something to drink. The lady of the house invited him in, gave […]
It was the middle of a hot summer and the air conditioning had broken down at a Catholic Church in Ireland. So they hired Seamus O’Sullivan to crawl around in the air ducts and figure out what was wrong. As Seamus peeked down through one of the old vents in […]
The Irish Intelligence Agency lost track of one of its secret agents, so they call in their top spy hunter to try and locate him. The head of the Agency says to the spy hunter, “All I can tell you is that his name is Murphy and that he is […]