Jokes in category:  Food Jokes

31 posts

Food glorious food. Here is a great collection of funny food jokes for you to enjoy. We love food don’t we, but we also love to tell jokes about food and why not!

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The International Diner

I had lunch at a place called the International Diner the other day. I sat down at a table, the waitress came over and the conversation went something like this… Waitress: “Are you very Hungary?” Me: “Yes, Siam.” Waitress: “What would you like me to Serbia?” Me: “I’ll have a […]

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Manhattan Clam Chowder

I was waiting tables at an exclusive country club, when an elegantly dressed woman spilled her bowl of Manhattan clam chowder all over her white linen skirt. She began dabbing at it furiously with her napkin. Having had plenty of experience with getting out food stains, I asked her, “May […]

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Cookies

The little boys mother shouted at him, “Tommy! There were two cookies in the pantry this morning but now there’s only one! Do you have an explanation?” Tommy replied, “It must have been too dark and I didn’t see the other one”.

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The Natural Foods Store

Susan was down with the flu earlier in the month and had sent her husband out shopping for groceries at her local natural foods store. Susan had given him a carefully prepared shopping list, which contained the items she required to maintain the strict diet the doctor had put her […]

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Jalapeño Peppers

A man walks up to a cashier in a New Mexico grocery store and asks rudely, “Hey, how much for these jalapeño peppers?” He pronounces it “joe-la-pen-oh” not “ha-la-peen-yo“. The cashier says, “Sir, that’s not what those peppers are called”. The man replies, “Listen, buddy, this is America, and I […]

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Mustard

As ham sandwiches go, this was perfection. A thick slice of ham on a fresh bun with crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet mustard. With the corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried the sandwich to the table in our back yard, picked it up […]

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Sandwiches

Two Irishmen went into a pub and after ordering two pints of Guinness, took some sandwiches out of their pockets and proceded to eat them. “You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here”, complained the barman. So, the two Irishmen passed their sandwiches across the table to each other. The […]