During a bank robbery, the robbers tied the bank cashier up and then gagged him after learning the combination to the safe. They then herded the other employees into a separate room under guard. After they finished emptying the safe and were about to leave, the cashier made desperate pleading […]
The Best Collection Of Finance Jokes
This is a list of financial definitions which someone sent me many moons ago and which I thought extremely appropriate for today’s political and financial climate in the USA. If you combine the corruption of the Trump administration with the fallout from the Coronavirus, this is likely to be what […]
Malcolm was walking to work one morning when he bumped into his friend Jeffrey, who looked as if he was really down in the dumps. Malcolm asked him why he looked so down in the dumps, dejected and sad and Jeffrey replied, “Oh Malcolm, the business is in financial trouble. […]
It is the middle of August and it’s holiday season in the South of France and there are lots of tourists visiting the region from all over the world. However, in a small town on the French coast, it is raining, so there is not too much business happening. With […]
Outside a small, independent bank in Kerry in Ireland, a crowd was gathering, all of them customers of the bank who were anxious about their finances. It was the time of the great depression and the world’s economies were in a state of shambles, with the value of their investments […]
The first year university student came running in tears to her father, crying “Dad, you gave me some terrible financial advice!” “I did what?, her father said, somewhat shocked. “What did I tell you?” he asked. “You told me to put my money in that big bank, and now that […]
A banker tells his client that a one million dollar investment will turn into a ton of money! So the the client asks the banker, “How much is a ton of money?” The banker responds, “About two thousand dollars!”
Whatever they do, have you ever wondered how accountants do it? Accountants do it by the book. Accountants do it within budget. Accountants do it to the bottom line. Accountants do it with double entries. Accountants do it between spreadsheets. Accountants are Certified to do it in Public. Accountants do […]
A man was filling out a life insurance application, but he was struggling with one of the sections. The insurance salesman asked him what the problem was. The man replied that he couldn’t answer the question about his father’s cause of death. When the salesman asked him why, the man […]
An insurance company manager was talking to one of his customers. He said, “Thank you, Mr. Jones, for your business. I can honsetly say that I wish I had twenty customers like you.” The customer, Mr. Jones, was rather astonished to hear this. He said to the manager, “Wow, well […]