If you love Drinking Jokes, you have come to the right place.
A minister was completing a Temperance sermon, telling the congregation in no uncertain terms all about the demon drink. With great emphasis, he called out to them, “If I had all the beer in the world, I’d take it and pour it into the river”. There are a quiet “Amen” […]
The Best Collection Of Drinking Jokes
47 posts
If you love Drinking Jokes, you have come to the right place.
If there ever was a topic where you can find jokes galore, it would have to be drink, drinking and people getting drunk.
I hope you enjoy this collection of drinking jokes, and don’t forget to look at our collection of Irish Jokes as well, because (surprise) a number of those involve drinking would you believe.
Murphy came home drunk as a skunk, only to find his angry wife standing at the front door waiting for him. When I say she was angry, she was livid, seething, furious and whatever other nasty mean ugly words to describe her mood that you might come up with. It […]
When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let’s all get drunk and go to heaven! Image used under a Collective Commons License from https://www.pexels.com/photo/summer-sunshine-alcohol-drink-1862/
A drunk goes into a bar, walks up to the bartender and calls out, “Drinks for everyone, and one for you too”. The bartender serves everyone in the bar, including himself. “That will be fifty dollars, please”, he says to the drunk. “I don’t have any money”, the drunk says. […]
A man walked into a bar and yelled out to the bartender, “Quick, give me a glass of beer, before it gets started!” The bartender looked at him as if he was crazy, “What started?! What are you talking about?!” “I don’t have time for questions, just give me the […]
I was sitting at the bar and couldn’t help but notice this young woman who was wearing skin tight leather pants. When I say “skin tight“, they looked as if they were practically painted on her. Puzzled as to how she managed to get them on, I walked over to […]
Two drunks were staggering home along the road, when one drunk looked up and said to the other, “What a beautiful night, look at the full moon”. The other drunk stopped and looked at his drunken friend. “You’re wrong, that’s not the moon, that’s the sun”, the drunk said. They […]
Two merchants from a small town in the Midwest, were attending a conference in New York City, it was the first time for either of them that they had seen such things as skyscrapers, big hotels, wide streets full of traffic etc, they were in awe. In the evening, there […]
Do you remember having the first drink you had with your son? I was reading an article last night about fathers and sons. Suddenly, I had memories come flooding back of the time I took my son out for his first pint. Off we went to our local pub, which […]
A drunk is sitting on the street curb in front of a bar. A stranger walks by and asks the drunk if he is okay. The drunk replies by asking him, “Do you know who I am?” The stranger says “No. Who are you?” The drunk proudly says, “I’m Jesus […]
