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A Few Nights In Hospital

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Have I told you about this one time I had to spend a few nights in hospital?

It happened a couple of years ago, I got sick and landed up in hospital.

There was this one nurse there that that just drove me crazy. She was young and pretty, but every time she came in, she would talk to me like I was a little child. She would say everything in a patronizing tone of voice, like “and how are we doing this morning?”, or “are we ready for a bath?” or “are we hungry?”.

Well, after a few nights in hospital and being talked to like this, it was really getting to me, as you might well imagine. I had had enough of this particular nurse, pretty though she might be and I decided it was time to play a trick on her.

So, one morning at breakfast, I took the apple juice off the tray and hid it in my bedside stand.

Later that morning, I was given a urine sample bottle to fill for testing, so you can probably guess where the apple juice went!

The nurse came in a while later, picked up the urine sample bottle, looked at it and said, “Oh my Mr Johnson, it seems we are a little cloudy today”.

As soon as she said this, I snatched the bottle out of her hand, popped off the top and gulped it down, saying, “Well, I’ll run it through again. Maybe I can filter it better this time!”

The nurse fainted and I just sat up in bed smiling.

Just don’t mess with old people.

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