Have you ever thought about ways to surprise people in a public toilet, or restroom as they are more often called in the USA.
You know what it’s like in there. Everyone, well almost everyone, tries to be as quiet as they can while using a public toilet, and to try and get in and out of there as inconspicuously as possible. But it’s not always possible to suppress the sounds of your bodily functions, and sometimes accidents happen as well.
But just for once, wouldn’t you like to do something that gives the other people who are using the toilet a surprise, maybe even raising a few laughs, or giving them something to talk about afterwards?
Here are a few ideas…
- Stick your open palm under the stall wall and ask your neighbor, “May I borrow a highlighter?”
- Say, “Uh oh, I knew I shouldn’t have put my lips on that.”
- Cheer and clap loudly every time somebody breaks the silence with a bodily function noise.
- Say, “Damn, this water’s cold.”
- Drop a marble and say, “Ahhhh! My glass eye!”
- Say, “Hmmm, I’ve never seen that color before.”
- Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a height of 6 feet. Sigh relaxingly.
- Say, “Now how did that get there?”
- Say, “Humus. Reminds me of humus.”
- Fill up a large flask with Mountain Dew. Squirt it erratically under the stall walls of your neighbors while yelling, “Whoa! Easy boy!”
- Say, “Interesting… more floaters than sinkers.”
- Using a small squeeze tube, spread peanut butter on a wad of toilet paper and drop the wad under the stall wall of your neighbor. Then say, “Whoops, could you kick that back over here please?”
- Say, “C’mon Mr. Happy! Don’t fall asleep on me.”
- Fill a balloon with creamed corn. Rush into the stall with your hand over your mouth and let out a lengthy vomit impression while you squeeze the balloon and splatter cream corn all about. Apologize profusely and blame it on the fettuccine alfredo you had for breakfast.
- Say, “Boy, that sure looks like a maggot.”
- Say, “Damn, I knew that drain hole was a little too small. Now what am I gonna do?”
- Play a well known drum cadence over and over again on your butt cheeks.
- Before you unroll toilet paper, conspicuously lay down your “Cross-Dressers Anonymous” newsletter on the floor visible to the adjacent stall.
- Lower a small mirror underneath the stall wall, adjust it so you can see your neighbor and say, “Peek-a-boo!”
- Drop a D-cup bra on the floor under the stall wall and sing “Born Free”
Image used under a Collective Commons License from: https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Public_toilet_in_Tallinn.JPG