A nun was in confession with her Mother Superior and they were discussing swearing and bad language. “I used some horrible language this week and feel absolutely terrible about it”, the nun said. “When did you use this awful language?” asks the Mother Superior. The nun replied, “Well, I was […]
A California lawyer from Los Angeles went duck hunting in rural Texas. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence. As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked him […]
After spending more than three hours enduring the long lines, the miserable clerks, and the insane regulations at the Department of Motor Vehicles, just to get the new licence plates for my truck, I stopped off at a toy store to pick up a gift for my son. I brought […]
Jenny was married to a Charlie who was a real male chauvinist. They both worked full time, but he never did anything around the house and certainly never did any housework. That, he declared, was woman’s work! But then one evening, Jenny arrived home from work to find the children […]
Two couples were on the golf course and were playing the last hole. When the last golfer drove off the tee, he hooked the shot, and the ball flew off sideways into a field of cows. He advised his friends to play through, and said that he would meet them […]
A surgeon, an architect, and a politician were considering the question of which of their professions was the oldest. “I think my line of work would win this one hands down,” the surgeon said. “After all, Eve was created from Adam’s rib, and that sounds like surgery to me.” “Maybe,” […]
A man suffered a horrific accident and his private parts were badly injured. He was rushed into hospital, where the doctor reassured him that modern medicine made it possible for his privates to be rebuilt. Unfortunately, his health insurance policy didn’t cover the expense. It was considered cosmetic surgery. The […]
A duke was hunting in the forest with his men at arms and servants when he came across a tree which had archery targets painted on it, and smack in the middle of each target was an arrow. “Who can this incredibly fine archer be?” cried the duke. “I must […]
Paddy is walking along the beach one day, when he sees an old bottle laying in the sand. He picks up the bottle and starts to brush it off, and with a huge puff of smoke, out pops a genie. The genie says to Paddy, “Since you have freed me […]
Some marriages work, while others don’t, which is great if yours does work, but life can be hell if you are in a marriage that just isn’t working. Fortunately, my wife and I have found the secret to making a marriage work, and we do (for the most part at […]