A fourth grade teacher was giving her pupils a lesson in logic, and decided to tell them a story about a man who loved fishing. “Here is the situation”, the teacher said. “A man is standing up in a boat in the middle of a river and he is fishing. […]
It was a terrible winter for the Highlands of Scotland with most of the land being buried under thick snow. It had been colder than normal, and there had been three months of unbroken blizzards, resulting in most of Scotland being covered in a thick blanket of snow that was […]
A chicken farmer went to the local watering hole and pulled up a stool and ordered champagne. A woman was sitting on the stool next to him. She turned to him and said: “How strange, I also just ordered a glass of champagne.” “What a coincidence”, said the farmer. He […]
One day, a young girl asked her mother, “Mommy, you now when you mix water and flour together you get glue?” Her Mother replied, “Yes sweetie”. The young girl continued, “Well Mommy, you know if you add eggs and sugar, you get cake?” Her Mother answered, “Yes dear, that’s right”. […]
A blonde woman steps into an elevator and with a meaming smile on her face says at the man who is already in there, “T-G-I-F”. The man smiles back at her and says, “S-H-I-T.” The blonde woman gives a puzzled look for a moment, then smiles back and replies, “T-G-I-F.” […]
A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments. The class had already covered the first nine commandments and was ready to discuss the last of the commandments. The teacher asked the class if anyone could tell her what it was. Little Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, […]
One night, at the lodge of a hunting club, two new members were being shown around and introduced to other members. The member who was leading them around said, “See that old man asleep in the chair by the fireplace? He is our oldest member and can tell you some […]
One day, my husband, who is pretty much housework challenged, decided to wash his college sweatshirt. Barely seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted out to me, “Sweetheart, what setting do I use on the washing machine?” “It depends”, I replied. “What does it say on your […]
Roger had an elderly duck that wasn’t eating lately, so he took his old duck to the vet as he was concerned about it. The vet explained that as ducks get older, their upper bills grow down over their lower bills and make it difficult for the animal to pick […]
I was having a big argument with my grandma the other day. One minute we were there having a lovely conversation, and then the topic turned to money and that’s when it all took off. “You only care about my inheritance”, she shouted at me. “It’s not that Grandma”, I […]
