Tag Archives: washington

The African Tribal Leader

Posted on by
Reply

An African Tribal Leader flew across the ocean to the United States to visit the president.

When he arrived at the Dulles International Airport in Washington, a host of newsmen and television cameramen met him.

One of the reporters asked the chief if he had a comfortable flight.

The chief made a series of weird noises …. “screech, scratch, honk, buzz, whistle, z-z-z-z-” … and then added in perfect English, “Yes, I had a very nice flight.”

Another reporter asked, “Chief, do you plan to visit the Washington Monument while you’re in the area?”

The chief made the same noises … “screech, scratch, honk, buzz, whistle, z-z-z-z” … and then said, “Yes, and I also plan to visit the White House and the Capitol Building.”

“Where did you learn to speak such flawless English?” asked the next reporter.

The chief replied, “Screech, scratch, honk, buzz, whistle, z-z-z-z … I spent my childhood years listening to short-wave radio broadcasts.”

The New Economic Stimulus Package

Posted on by

american_medical_associationApparently the American Medical Association has just weighed in on the new economic stimulus package . . .

The Allergists voted to scratch it, but the Dermatologists advised not to make any rash moves.

The Gastroenterologists had sort of a gut feeling about it, but the Neurologists thought the Administration had a lot of nerve.

The Obstetricians felt they were all laboring under a misconception. Ophthalmologists considered the idea shortsighted.

Pathologists yelled, “Over my dead body!” while the Pediatricians said, “Oh, grow up!”

The Psychiatrists thought the whole idea was madness, while the Radiologists could see right through it.

Surgeons decided to wash their hands of the whole thing. The Internists thought it was a bitter pill to swallow, and the Plastic Surgeons said, “This puts a whole new face on the matter.”

The Podiatrists thought it was a step forward, but the Urologists were pissed off at the whole idea.

The Anesthesiologists thought the whole idea was a gas, and the Cardiologists didn’t have the heart to say no.

In the end, the Proctologists won out, leaving the entire decision up to the assholes in Washington .

No offense intended to the new government, it’s a whole lot better than the old one, and in my opinion President Obama is doing a great job.  I just thought this was a clever joke.

Canadian Blonde

Posted on by

An elderly blonde lived on a small farm in Canada, just yards away from the North Dakota border.

Their land had been the subject of a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for years.

The now widowed blonde, lived on the farm with her son and three grandchildren.

One day, her son came into her room holding a letter.

“I just got some news, Mom,” he said. “The government has come to an agreement with the people in Washington. They’ve decided that our land is really part of the United States. We have the right to approve or disapprove of the agreement. What do you think?”

“What do I think?” his blonde mother said. “Sign it! Call them right now and tell them we accept! I don’t think I could stand another one of those Canadian winters!”