If you remember the original television game show Hollywood Squares and its comics, this may bring a tear to your eyes.
These great questions and answers are from the days when the ‘Hollywood Squares’ game show responses were spontaneous, not scripted, as they are now.
Peter Marshall was the host asking the questions, of course..

Q. Do female frogs croak?
A. Paul Lynde: If you hold their little heads under water long enough.

Q.If you’re going to make a parachute jump, at least how high should you be?
A. Charley Weaver: Three days of steady drinking should do it.

Q. True or False, a pea can last as long as 5,000 years.
A. George Gobel: Boy, it sure seems that way sometimes.

Q.You’ve been having trouble going to sleep. Are you probably a man or a woman?
A. Don Knotts: That’s what’s been keeping me awake.

Q. According to Cosmopolitan, if you meet a stranger at a party and you think that he is attractive, is it okay to come out and ask him if he’s married?
A. Rose Marie: No; wait until morning.

Q.Which of your five senses tends to diminish as you get older?
A. Charley Weaver: My sense of decency.

Q. In Hawaiian, does it take more than three words to say ‘I Love You’?
A. Vincent Price: No, you can say it with a pineapple and a twenty.

Q.As you grow older, do you tend to gesture more or less with your hands while talking?
A. Rose Marie: You ask me one more growing old question Peter, and I’ll give you a gesture you’ll never forget.

Q. Paul, why do Hell’s Angels wear leather?
A. Paul Lynde: Because chiffon wrinkles too easily.

Q.Charley, you’ve just decided to grow strawberries. Are you going to get any during the first year?
A. Charley Weaver: Of course not, I’m too busy growing strawberries.

Q. In bowling, what’s a perfect score?
A. Rose Marie: Ralph, the pin boy.

Q. It is considered in bad taste to discuss two subjects at nudist camps. One is politics, what is the other?
A. Paul Lynde: Tape measures.

Q. During a tornado, are you safer in the bedroom or in the closet?
A. Rose Marie: Unfortunately Peter, I’m always safe in the bedroom.

Q. Can boys join the Camp Fire Girls?
A. Marty Allen: Only after lights out.

Q. When you pat a dog on its head he will wag his tail. What will a goose do?
A. Paul Lynde: Make him bark?

Q.If you were pregnant for two years, what would you give birth to?
A. Paul Lynde: Whatever it is, it would never be afraid of the dark.

Q. According to Ann Landers, is there anything wrong with getting into the habit of kissing a lot of people?
A.. Charley Weaver: It got me out of the army.

Q. It is the most abused and neglected part of your body, what is it?
A. Paul Lynde: Mine may be abused, but it certainly isn’t neglected.

Q.Back in the old days, when Great Grandpa put horseradish on his head, what was he trying to do?
A. George Gobel: Get it in his mouth.

Q. Who stays pregnant for a longer period of time, your wife or your elephant?
A. Paul Lynde: Who told you about my elephant?

Q.When a couple have a baby, who is responsible for its sex?
A. Charley Weaver: I’ll lend him the car, the rest is up to him.

Q. Jackie Gleason recently revealed that he firmly believes in them and has actually seen them on at least two occasions. What are they?
A. Charley Weaver: His feet.

Q. According to Ann Landers, what are two things you should never do in bed?
A. Paul Lynde: Point and laugh

Here are some comments made by sports commentators that I’m sure  they all would like to take back:

Weightlifting commentator at the Olympic Snatch and Jerk Event:
“This is Gregoriava from Bulgaria. I saw her snatch this morning  during her warm up and it was amazing.”

Ted Walsh – Horse Racing Commentator:
“This is really a lovely horse and I speak from personal experience since I once mounted her mother.”

Grand Prix Race Announcer:
“The lead car is absolutely, truly unique, except for the one behind it  which is exactly identical to the one in front of the similar one in back.”

Greg Norman, Pro Golfer:
“I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father.”

Ringside Boxing Analyst:
“Sure there have been injuries and even some deaths in boxing -  but none of them really that serious.”

Baseball announcer:
“If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing again.”

Basketball analyst:
“He dribbles a lot and the opposition doesn’t like it. In fact  you can see it all over their faces.”

At a trophy ceremony BBC TV Boat Race 1988:
“Ah, isn’t that nice, the wife of the Cambridge president is hugging the cox of the Oxford crew.”

Metro Radio, College Football:
“Julian Dicks is everywhere. It’s like they’ve got eleven Dicks on the field.”

US Open TV Commentator:
“One of the reasons Arnie Palmer is playing so well is that, before each final round, his wife takes out his balls and kisses them.  Oh my God, what have I just said?”