My Life Broken Down Into Segments

Tags: daily duties, eating, humor, my life, sleeping, working

This video shows what happens when you try and hitchhike in your older years.

Tags: bicycle, cycle problems, funny video, hitchhiking, old woman

Charley, a new retiree greeter at Walmart, just couldn’t seem to get to work on time. Every day he was 5, 10, even 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker,really tidy, clean shaven, sharp minded, a real credit to the company and obviously demonstrating their “Older Person Friendly” policy. One day the boss [...]

Tags: greeter, retirees, retirement jokes, walmart, walmart greeter, walmart jokes

This is a hilariously funny poem that was written by a friend of mine about breasts, and how women feel about them as they get older. I hope you enjoy it… Between my neck and belly, My dynamic duo rests, Among a slew of other names, They’re politely called my breasts. You can read the [...]

Tags: boob poetry, boobies, boobs, breast poems, breasts, droopy breasts, firm breasts, large breasts, poetry for women, saggy breasts, small breasts, titties, womens breasts

Jacob (92) and Rebecca (85) are all excited about their decision to get married. They go for a stroll to discuss the wedding and on the way go past a drugstore. Jacob suggests that they go in, and then Jacob addresses the man behind the counter: ” Are you the owner?” The pharmacist answers ” [...]

Tags: baby boomers, drugstore jokes, getting married, getting old, marriage, Marriage Jokes, old age, wedding jokes, weddings

Six retired Floridians were playing poker in the condo clubhouse when Meyerwitz loses $500 on a single hand, clutches his chest and drops dead at the table. Showing respect for their fallen comrade, the other five continue playing standing up. Finkelstein looks around and asks, “So, who’s gonna’ tell his wife?” They draw straws. Goldberg [...]

Tags: florida, floridians, gambling, jewish jokes, old age, playing poker, poker, poker game, retirees

A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and orders a Scotch with two drops of water. As the bartender gives her the drink she says, ‘I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it’s today.’ The bartender says, ‘Well, since it’s your birthday, I’ll buy you a drink. In fact, [...]

Tags: 80th birthday, cruise, cruise ship, eighty years old, old age, scotch, two drops of water, whisky

I got this new deodorant today. The instructions said remove cap and push up bottom. I can barely walk, but whenever I fart the room smells awesome.

Tags: deororant, fart, instructions, perfume, Women Jokes

A group of Americans was traveling by tour bus through Holland . As they stopped at a cheese farm, a young guide led them through the process of cheese making, explaining that goat’s milk was used. She showed the group a lovely hillside where many goats were grazing. ‘These’ she explained, ‘Are the older goats [...]

Tags: americans, cheese, cheese farm, goats milk, guide, holland, old gentleman, old goats, out to pasture, pasture, spry, tour bus, tour groups, young guide

Being a Baby Boomer and also currently unemployed, which is rather like being retired, as you lose track of what day of the week it is etc, I thought these might be rather appropriate for today (whatever day it is of course)… I was thinking about how a status symbol of today is those cell [...]

Tags: baby boomers, old age, unemployed